Epic Carnival | Where Sports and Pop Culture Collide: Urban Mushing: Mike Vick's Next Favorite Sport

Urban Mushing: Mike Vick's Next Favorite Sport

by Chimpanzee Rage, Deuce of Davenport

In Southern California there is no shortage of ways to waste your time and if Michael Vick is looking for a new way to use dogs in sport there in Hot-lanta, he might have found it. Its Urban Mushing, take a dog or two (using huskies, malamutes, dobermans, dalmatians or whatever you might have), hook it up to a specially designed scooter (costing from $175.00 to $750.00, or $2500.00 for the electric version), teach the dogs some commands ("gee" for right, "haw" for left, "easy" to slow down and "on-by" to pass) and OFF YOU GO!

Your dog can now work up a full sweat while you sit back and enjoy the ride to the Kwik-E-Mart! Fuck Segways, these bitches run on DAWG POWER, son! No way is someone going to come after you for your ride when you have two lathered up huskies in front of you. I'd imagine Vick would use the dogs in some sorta wild-ass game of chicken...scary thought, but it is EXTREME!

Seriously though...stop being a lazy bastard and walk your damn dog like everyone else. That, or take them to a dog park and let them have some free reign while you talk to the other crazy dog park "regulars". Just don't have these poor bitches carry your fat ass around, while you give it the name of some new extreme "urban" sport.

Don't think its real? Well, we have video to prove it.



Source: San Jose Mercury News

I mean really, did you expect me to post a story about a real sport on the Carnival's first day? Its a little slice of the Deuce of Davenport on the Carnival for you. - Chimpanzee Rage

3 comment(s):

More Credible said...

That is so 'core.

Pacman Jonesin' said...

What in the hell is wrong with people?

Anonymous said...

if you cared to research the snow dogs you would be enlightened to know that these pups LOVE and LIVE
to pull - and its just as much of
a workout for the 'musher' as the dogs - don't knock it until you try it...


Related Posts with Thumbnails