LinkGasm 8-9-07

by , Winning the Turnover Battle

LinkGasm is your one-stop-shop for all the stuff that isn't being spit out by the Carnies here at Epic Carnival. Expect sarcasm, girls, and some sports thrown in as well. If you'd like to be considered for inclusion in future editions, please email your stories here.

- It is only 12 days until Hayden Panettiere's 18th birthday. Funny how she is the one giving us presents. (The Bastardly)

- In what may well be the best abuse of roller coaster picture machines ever...X-treme Chess. (Deuce of Davenport)

- The Cubs' Angel Pagan (great name) has been put on the DL with colitis. So...uh...what is colitis? It has to do with your colon, and then there are these big bumps you see, and then... (Out of Right Field)

- You want some really unbreakable records? Try these on for size. Any list of records that can reference both whiskey and flat-tops is a winner in my book. (The Onion)

- Rajon Rando got beat in a shooting contest by Doc Rivers' 8th grade son. I repeat, Rajon Rando got beat in a shooting contest by Doc Rivers 8th grade son. How on Earth did Danny Ainge not sign Brevin Knight last week? Oh I forgot; it is because he is a terrible GM. Nevermind. (The Fanhouse)

You'd think that being a professional baseball player would mean that you pretty much can get laid at will. Unless you're a Minor League baseball player. Then you take out sex wanted ads. (The Big Lead)