Epic Carnival | Where Sports and Pop Culture Collide: Oh Woody Austin...Do You Have Any Idea What You've Done?

Oh Woody Austin...Do You Have Any Idea What You've Done?

by dswinder, Sons of Sam Malone

Let's just start this sucker out by showing everyone exactly what Woody Austin actually said...

"...Well, you said in the media, especially on Friday, that he played just an unbelievable round of golf and that he was in total control and that he was just toying with the field. We can go through our rounds. I outplayed him on Friday, but he beat me by seven shots.

So, does that mean he -- does that mean he's that much better? I don't get it. It just happens that he scored better, and like I said on Friday, can you not throw away that many opportunities when you are trying to win a big golf tournament. He took advantage; I didn't. Does that mean he played better than me or he's better than me? I don't agree with that."
Woody...Woody...Wody...What. In. The. Hell. Were you thinking? Have you never heard of a guy named Rory Sabbatini? If not check this out...I'll wait...Come back and we'll continue this conversation when you're up to speed...

Ok...Now, do you fully understand the severe tomfoolery of what you said? Please...Say you do...You see Woodrow, when someone like you, or Rory decide to make outlandish statements like, "I outplayed him on Friday, but he beat me by seven shots." That just motivates Tiger to beat you by nine shots next time...How can you possibly convince even yourself that you outplayed someone who beat you by seven shots....SEVEN...? You say you just threw away opportunities, and that's why he beat you on Friday...Well, lemme check my handbook, but as I recall that's part of playing well...You know, converting opportunities. It's kind of a big deal. It's hard to win a sport if you don't take advantage of opportunities...Not to mention, doesn't everyone start the day with the same opportunities?...I mean, you're all playing the same course...Aren't you? Doesn't your score ALWAYS reflect how well you took advantage of opportunities, and isn't your score the ultimate judge of how well you played? Who knows? Maybe I'm wrong, but I just don't see the thought process behind saying things like, "He took advantage; I didn't. Does that mean he played better than me or he's better than me? I don't agree with that." Especially after you lost, and even more so, don't say it about the best player in the game today, and more than likely, when all is said and done, ever...

So Woody, I'll give you a free pass this time...But don't be surprised if Tiger isn't as forgiving...Good luck out there...I hope your pride is iron clad...

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