Top 10 Signs You're Becoming A Very, Very Old Football Fan

by DMtShooter, Five Tool Tool

10) You remember the USFL -- and individual players from it (Herschel Walker! Doug Flutie! Sam Mills! Kelvin Bryant! Jim Kelly! Vince Evans! Wait, I have more...)

9) Every offense looks like they throw the ball too goddamn much

8) You still can't quite grasp that the Cardinals are in Phoenix, and Los Angeles has no team

7) Coors Light commercials fool you into thinking they are real

6) You sometimes tune in to the late game on CBS just to make sure you haven't missed the start of "60 Minutes"

5) Your idea of an innovative defensive scheme is to switch to the 3-4

4) You still don't quite trust the idea of a black quarterback... and you're black yourself

3) You have fond memories of Stick-Um

2) You still think Al Davis as evil and a genius, rather than pathetic, incompetent and senile

1) Every roughing the passer call makes you shake your fist at the screen and scream "Pussies"