Kobe May Want to Be Traded. Or Not.

by BOHChris, Blog of Hilarity

It's kind of hard to tell at this point what exactly is in Kobe Bryant's head, but leading firecrotch reporter Rachel Nichols and ESPN.com's Chris Sheridan are on the case.

Nichols: "You said one day you wanted to be traded, you said you wanted to be a 'Laker for life.' There were different phone calls back and forth."

Bryant: "I think a lot of people misinterpreted it. But that's water under the bridge to me, because going forward, we're handling our situation between ourselves, meaning the Lakers organization and myself. If things, if things were to be different, we both would have handled the situation a little differently."...

And despite Kobe saying now that the Lakers know exactly how he feels, what is going to matter much more is how he feels then.

Will Kobe be there when the Lakers report to camp in Hawaii? After looking him in the eye and getting a bit of a fresh mid-August reading of his mood, I'm not so certain he will be.

So what does it all mean? Exactly what it meant two months ago: Kobe may or may not be happy, may or not want to be traded, may or may not think Andrew Bynum is a big fat waste of perfectly good semen, who knows? I wouldn't be shocked if he showed up to Lakers' camp and pretended that all was right. Conversely, I wouldn't be shocked if he showed up to Lakers' camp and decided to cannibalize the entire team. Literally.

Kobe's really beginning to act like a confused woman. A confused woman whom he hasn't raped yet.