BECAUSE SOMEBODY HAS TO: MICHIGAN

by Ray, Flyers Fieldhouse

To say Michigan's season has been a disappointment thus far is to say Britney might need therapy. Given the preseason expectations, the Wolverines' 2-2 record is an unmitigated disaster. You can go ahead with your tired Appalachian State jokes. I've moved on and pretended like each one doesn't make my intestines burst.

So how is this any different from any other year? Once again, I went into the Big Ten season in search of desperately needed consolation prizes. Such is life in the Lloyd Carr era. Whatever, I've accepted it. And even despite our putrid first two weeks of the season, I see no reason to preclude my Wolverines from Big Ten title contention. I warn you: Don't sleep on Michigan.

As follows are the prevailing reasons why Michigan will win the Big Ten.

1. Um...they still play in the Big Ten. Honestly, look at the schedule awaiting the Wolverines in the next six weeks. It's your typical suburban Midwestern high school setting, replete with the nerdy math kids (Northwestern, Illinois, Minnesota), the guy that ruled your sixth grade class but hasn't been heard from since (Purdue), the new kid that gets stuffed in lockers (Eastern Michigan), and that one guy that so desperately wants to fit in, makes his parents buy him the entire Abercrombie catalog, but will never even remotely be on the cool kids' radar (Michigan State). But honestly, it's cute that you're trying, Sparty.

If there's one thing this Michigan team needs, it's clearly some time to gel on defense. Wholesale changes were made after just two weeks, and experience is the only way the Appalachian State and Oregon debacles can be avoided. There will be six weeks of laughably subpar competition to learn schemes, adjust to teammates' tendencies, and hopefully develop tackling habits that don't just look like slap fights. Come the last two weeks when it matters most at Wisconsin and against Ohio State, this team will be ready.

2. Ryan Mallett. I've been a staunch, and somewhat blind, supporter of Chad Henne since his freshman season. I always threw out stats that ultimately proved meaningless in crunch time. A major problem was Chad was never the type of personality that a team could rally around. At certain positions, you can get away with being the silent leader, letting your play speak for itself. Quarterback is not one of those positions. While still obviously very green, Ryan Mallett brings a sense of excitement to the huddle that is contagious. He may be the whitest, most awkward kid I've ever seen in pads, but I'll be damned if he wasn't leanin' with it and rockin' with it with Adrian Arrington two weeks ago. He clearly has no sense of embarrassment, as he looked like an absolute idiot. But who cares? The guy is genuinely having fun out there, and after being beaten down by every major media outlet in the free world for two weeks, levity is a good thing.

3. The defensive line. Broken ribs, thy name be Brandon Graham. Remember the face, folks. Brandon Graham is going to be a bonafide star. God knows how many poor, unsuspecting quarterbacks will be crooshed beneath the Unrelenting One. Sure, the offensive lines of Notre Dame and Penn State have to concentrate just to not fall over at the point of attack, but the return of coherent D-line play had a lot to do with those teams doing pirouettes all afternoon. If Tim Jamison ever stops running 12 yards upfield after the snap, this might once again be a unit to be feared (much like my own).

4. The receivers. When you draw up the prototype for an effective receiving corps, the Michigan three-wide should be the product. You have your deep threat in Mario Manningham, your intermediate threat in Adrian Arrington, and your short yardage underneath threat in Greg Matthews. All are sure-handed and are athletic enough to go up and get a ball over just about any corner. Each is an extremely tough cover one-on-one, which typically means safeties have to shade over to help, opening the middle of the field. As Ryan Mallett's touch improves, so too should the potentially face-melting vertical game. And if Mike DeBord ever tires of running stretch plays 80% of the game, we might even get to see it.

5-10. Mike. Freaking. Hart. Yes, he warrants the final six places on this list. He's that good. Despite him being on the covers of magazines, dominating Sportscenter clips, and all that other jazz, he still feels like he's our little secret. No one else really understands what he means to this program. Without Mike Hart, I don't doubt that this team is 0-4 right now. It's clear that his heart was broken by the opening losses. He came back for so much more, only to have incompetence run rampant and leave his dreams of amateur immortality to shrivel and die. But he never called anyone out, despite being given many chances. He never said he regretted coming back, despite being given even more chances. He only looked to the next week, and repeated his desire to be in Ann Arbor, and ONLY in Ann Arbor. And I believe him. I can't say I'd believe many others, but Mike Hart's word has earned the right to be treated as gospel. He is the living, breathing spirit of Michigan football, and I wouldn't want my season placed in anyone else's hands.