MATCH.COM MONDAYS: COLT BRENNAN

by Rupert, Ghosts of Wayne Fontes

As we make our way through this world, we're all trying to do one thing... procreate. But sometimes, it's hard to find a partner who shares the same interests as you do. I'm all about love baby, so I'll be promoting the Match.com profiles of our favorite athletes/commentators/journalists. You never know, you the reader might find the love of your life!

This Week's Featured Profile: Colt Brennan
Display Name: Rasta_Man_Strong_Gun
Status: Online now!

*age: 24-year-old man
* seeking: enlightenment
* seeking: I just want to roll with it, without straps, bars, or bun wrappers

Relationships: It's all about the phlow, you can't predict when you might fall in love brah.
Have kids: Don't think so
Ethnicity: Jah Minion
Body type: Complete
Height: 6'3"
Religion: Rastafarian. I don't really get it, but I feel real laid back.
Smoke: Only the Ganj
Drink: Heavily and often (I don't expose myself to my neighbors anymore though)

For Fun:
Hangin' out on with the Samoans listening to Marley. I have a Bob Marley sticker on my practice helmet you know? Sometimes, I like chillin' out by the beach, but I'd probably rather go on the road with Phish if they ever get back together. Remember the '98 summer tour funk? Sick. Surfing is chill, but there's so many poseurs. I just wanna live free with my brothers and sisters.

My Job:
Playing quarterback for the Hawaii Rainbows. It' a cool gig, but man, why is everyone all up in my business? I just got some nice headies to smoke, but everyone keeps asking me all these stupid questions. Dude, why you all gotta be all Makisupa up in my shit? I made a mistake back in Boulder, but I'm a changed man.

Favorite Hot Spots:
Anywhere with good chili cheese fries and chocolate shakes. Mmm. Ooh, and fish tacos with cole slaw. You know what would be good right now though? In and Out Burger.

Favorite Things:
Catching a nice breaker, a solid Marley bootleg, watching the CU Buffaloes falter without me (haha morons), freshy pow, falling in love with beautiful girls I want to spend my whole life with, and going to parties at Bill Walton's house.

Last Read:
The Pharmer's Almanac, Volume 6

About Me and Who I'm Looking For:
I am looking for a kynd sister to drive my car when I can't steer it. Dude, this is good herb. I'm looking for the Boddhi to my Johhny Utah. Nobody in 1-A seems to understand my vibe. I love playing ball, but I think I could do just as well if I was in a band of something. Everyone is so concerned with stats and trophies. I do want to win that trophy everyone keeps talking about though. I really want to use it to drop that "talk to the hand" joke. I think that would be hilarious. Seriously though, I'm really looking for a partner who really catches my groove; rides my same karma wave. Well, that and sniffing hot Hawaiian butt.


If you think you want to meet this chill fellow, that's cool, we'll run into each other one of these days. Stay cool and rest easy.