RANDOM OBSERVATIONS : BILLS @ STEELERS : FIRST HALF EDITION

by Davey, Blown Coverage

On Sunday's I usually do the "Random Observations" over at Blown Coverage and today I decided to bring it over to the Epic Carnival.

For those of you that aren't familiar with the concept, I basically sit here shirtless and slouched over and I just grunt manly noises while adding some sort of commentary to whichever game I'm watching. Today's game is Buffalo at Pittsburgh and Ian Eeagle and Solomon Wilcots are here to lead us the way...

• The Steelers are wearing their throwback jerseys and I can't say that I'm a big fan. It's like Big Benjamin is wearing an UPS shirt with a mustard colored helmet. Not a very flattering look if you ask me.
  

• Willie Parker just busted a nice 21 yard run and then got referred to as "Najeh Davenport" by Ian Eagle and then as "Willie Foster" by Wilcots. The CBS crew is sharp today folks..

• Speaking of Davenport, he just made a nice tackle on special teams on Terrence McGee and promptly followed by taking a huge dump on McGee's chest. See what I did there? I got the obvious joke out of the way early. Awesome.
  

• I love it when teams trade turnovers. First the Bills fail to convert on 4th down, but Huge Benjamin gives it right back by trying to force it deep to one of his receivers. The first quarter is almost over and this has been as pleasant as discussing politics with Shannon Sharpe.

• The Cialis commercial says that if I have an erection that lasts longer than 4 hours, that I should consult my doctor. Well, the Cialis people obviously don't know me. If I have an erection that lasts longer than 4 hours, I'll walk around with a firm bounce in my step while giving high fives to everyone around me.

• Hines Ward seemed to have caught a touchdown but the refs say that he trapped it and the Steelers have to settle for their second Jeff Reed field goal of the day. At least Reed wasn't naked during the kick. If you're keeping check, that's obvious joke number 2 that I've gotten out of the way already.
  

• According to Yahoo!, the Bucs are leading the Saints 14-0 in the 2nd quarter and that's basically what happens to you when you are Peter King's preseason Super Bowl pick. If you take the Madden Curse and let it have a wild orgy with the SI Cover curse, you get the Peter King curse. I expect the Saints to go winless this season because of that...

• J.P. Losman looks lost out there. If Losman doesn't turn it around soon here, he's going to get traded to Seattle after the game.
  

• For some reason, the Bills defenders are making Big Benjamin look like Vince Young. They pressure him but he somehow eludes the rush every time and gets the pass off while a few Bills defenders lay on the ground with their pants around their ankles. It just doesn't seem right...

• There's that Jeff Reed guy again. Reed kicks his 4th field goal of the half and he's probably on his way to some sort of record if this keeps up. He's definitely on his way to some drunken romp with a random hooker, no matter how this ends up.
  

• And God has mercy on our souls. Halftime is here and Jeff Reed leads the Bills 12-0.The Steeler uniforms raped my eyes, now Shannon Sharpe can rape my ears. Hopefully he didn't take his Cialis today...