WHY PACMAN JONES DOESN'T PLAY CRICKET

by Eric Horowitz, ShakedownSports

It looks like Roger Goodell isn’t the only sports disciplinarian with a disdain for strip clubs. This week English cricket player Paul Collingwood was fined 1,000 pounds for visiting “a lap dancing bar” during a cricket tournament.

The real bad news for Collingwood is that he can’t even say the nighttime entertainment helped him get ready for the next match. The following day against South Africahe recored a “first-ball duck”, something akin to repeatedly striking out with the bases loaded.

Fortunately, Collingwood is extremely well versed in the athlete tradition of accepting blame while denying responsibility.

“The fact is I made a mistake, that’s what it comes down to, and what I need to focus on now is a big game tomorrow [England play India] for us.

“I was taken in a car with friends and taken to the bar and got there, had a beer and thought ‘I need to get out of this place’.”

For now Collingwood’s behavior will be a warning to all those young whippersnapper cricket players who think it’s alright if they go to strip clubs during tournaments. The lesson, as always, is if you want to be a famous athlete in England and a sexual deviant, it’s best to be a soccer player.

(Originally published 9/21)