MY TEAM WAS BETTER! YOU LOST? SHUT UP!

by Andrew, The Grand National Championships

I know I've made mention of Rockies CEO Charlie Monfort before on this site. I personally find him repellent. Why? There are countless reasons.

But suffice it to say that a rich white Evangelical who goes around acting like he's a victim while efforting at trademarking a twenty-five year old phrase in an effort to make college DJ's pay the Rockies money every time they wish to play anything from AC/DC to ZZ Top within this month holds a couple of reasons within nicely.

But the Red Sox were the Day Men to the Rockies Night Men, and they brought karate and friendship to everyone in a silky smooth four game sweep. It was a demolition where the red Sox set offensive standards last touched by the Murders Row. Quite frankly, the Red Sox owned the Rockies.

Even the 1337 haXXor felt it was pwnership. It happens. On paper, the Red Sox were dominant favorites. The punditocracy were debating not if the Red Sox would win, but when.

And yet? Charlie Monfort saw a different series.

• Monfort insisted after Game 4 of the World Series that the Rockies are a better team than the Boston Red Sox, a team that outscored them 29-10 in a four-game Series sweep."These guys did amazing things," Monfort said. "I think this team is a better team than Boston. It would have been nice to have another two, three, four days. We'll wake up tomorrow and go, 'There's no baseball game to go to,' but what a deal they did. It's an amazing thing they accomplished just to get here."

They were amazing, all right. But better than the Red Sox?

• "I think so," said Monfort. "How did we win 21 out of 22? We got the breaks. And I think they got the breaks. Are they a better team? I don't think so. You give us 10 games against them, we'll beat them six."

Now I'm not one that would say that a more talented team can be taken down. In a one-game situation, upsets happen all the time. Your college football season bears this out. But you can even see this happen in a series situation. (A dominant pitching staff or a match-up advantage.)

But Charlie Monfort does not own the fine logic skills to understand that a talented but lucky team got destroyed. The clock struck Midnight. The Colorado Rockies might not even take six straight from the Pawtucket PawSox, let alone the New Britain Rock Cats. It's just science fact.

Oh. Wait. Monfort believes Science is a temptation of the devil.