THAT'S SURELY NOT GOING TO END WELL

by Davey, Blown Coverage

So, what's the proper way to react after your team gets hammered 58-10? Well, you get hammered yourself, you take out Junior and you take a piss on the bar of a tavern.

That's basically what Baylor assistant coach Eric Schnupp did after the Bears got their asses handed to them by Kansas on Saturday.

Bartender Danny Severe said in Tuesday's editions of the Waco Tribune-Herald that the incident happened around closing time and that Schnupp apparently thought no one was watching him as employees were moving patrons out of the building.

Severe said an employee witnessed Schnupp urinating on the bar, and a manager told police officers who were there for an unrelated matter.

Severe said Schnupp had taken several shots of hard liquor, most bought for him by other people.

Now, I've never urinated on a bar before so I'm no expert on this matter, but I'm thinking that Rupp had some better options here to work with.

1. Take a leak in the bathroom.
2. Take a leak on the floor.
3. Take a leak in your pants
4. Take a leak in some foreigner's taxi cab.
5. Take a leak in your car.
6. Take a leak outside.
7. Take a leak behind the bar.
8. Take a leak on some hooker.
9. Take a leak on some homeless guy.
10. Just hold it.

Anything that does not include pissing on the bar is a good option in this case. Pissing while standing on the bar basically assures you of getting caught and getting interaction with an officer of the law.

I really don't see any scenario in which standing up and taking a piss on the bar will end up good for you. Well, unless the bartender is Michael Strahan and then he'd probably enjoy seeing a big drunk man drain the lizard on top of his bar.

Either way, I'm surprised that this offense only carries a $258 dollar fine. But hey, I avoid law class like David Carr avoids his receivers so what do I know about misdemeanors...