THE BEER TENT: JUICE-TICE IS SERVED

by dswinder, Sons of Sam Malone

Here at Epic Carnival, we meet weekly under The Beer Tent to shoot the shit. I, dswinder, will be the ringleader, but you can join in on the discussion every Monday Tuesday at, eh, 2ish 3ish ? !

So... Barry Bonds.

Believe me, I realize you've been bombarded with news, commentary, and opinion on the guy ever since the indictments were handed down last week. And trust me, I hate to hear about him as much, if not more, than you. Hell, that was even the topic of the first installment of The Beer Tent. You can rest easy knowing that I understand opinions are like assholes -- everyone has one, no need to let it show. But, you must also understand -- I'm an asshole with an opinion -- so sit back and try to relax. It'll be over before you know it.

Anyway, Barry Bonds. Hate him? Love him? Completely indifferent? Regardless, he's a cheater.

For the past few years, Bonds apologists from coast to coast, network to network, and "pharmacy" to "pharmacy" have been denying that the slugger used performance enhancing drugs. There have been claims of racism (grasping for straws). Arguments on a lack of proof. And even the occasional "He was a Hall of Fame worthy player before the juice." points of view. You name it, it's been made into an excuse.

I won't even get into the sheer ridiculousness of the previous jive. I won't even begin to mention that baseball players of all skin tones have been investigated and ridiculed for steroids. I won't even consider addressing Bonds' obvious change in physical appearance. And I would never, ever even think about bringing to light Pete Rose's career pre-gambling. All of that would be far too fruitless to consume my precious time.

Instead, I think I'll just opine on the situation currently at hand.

Barry Bonds cheated. He has been indicted on four counts of perjury and one count of obstruction of justice. If he were an "everyday American", he'd be staring down the barrel of thirty years. But, since he isn't an "everyday American," old Baroid probably will never be privy to a sniff inside of a prison cell. Does that piss me off? It should, but no. I'm just happy that the number of Balco Barry apologists will begin to dwindle. Finally, Barry will get what he's had coming to him for nearly ten years.

And I don't want to hear the whole "innocent until proven guilty" spiel. The indictments are for a reason -- otherwise they would have been doled out long ago. If the plans were to indict Bonds simply for the sake of hatred, believe me, it wouldn't have taken this long. The evidence sufficient enough for common sense has been there. Now, the proof good enough for legality has shown up to the party.

So, I'm happy that doubters will become believers. I'm relieved that defenders will become denouncers. I'm satisfied that justice will finally be served. Sure, there will still be backers of Barry just like people still believe O.J. is innocent and grape Kool-Aid is the way to righteousness. Just last Friday on PTI, Dan Le Batard questioned why the San Francisco Giants and Major League Baseball aren't being punished right alongside Barry -- because, you know, they benefited through his cheating. I must be forgetting the minute detail where the Giants and MLB supplied Barry with the syringe and said "Here, use this." But that's just an example of a straggling Bonds' protector.

The majority now realize what the rest of us realized all along -- Barry Bonds broke the rules to break the record.

Now with the cat running free from the bag, we can finally bury the hatchet. I think most everyone agrees that Hank Aaron is the all-time home run champion. Finally, after years of accusations and defense, the prosecution moves to the courtroom, and the plaintiff must face real consequences -- consequences with far more weight than talk radio, fan forums, and sports blogs can provide. Maybe after this is all said and done, we can officially rid ourselves of this sour taste and move on. There are too many athletes out there that play by the rules to have our vision dominated by a cheater. But until that time:

So... Barry Bonds.

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If you happen to actually read The Beer Tent (Hi Mom and Dad), you probably noticed that it was nowhere to be seen last week. Well, it's strange what Political Science and English will do to a well-laid schedule. No worries, though. I'm back on track and ready to annoy. Oh, and another note -- in case you missed it in the intro at the top, I've been moved to Tuesdays at 3ish EST. So, yeah, don't look for me on Mondays anymore. That is all.