MATCH.COM MONDAYS: KIRK HINRICH

by Sterling Gould, More Credible

As we make our way through this world, we're all trying to do one thing... procreate. But sometimes, it's hard to find a partner who shares the same interests as you do. I'm all about love baby, so I'll be promoting the Match.com profiles of our favorite athletes/commentators/journalists. You never know, you the reader might find the love of your life!

This Week's Featured Profile: Kirk Hinrich!
Display Name: That_Invisible_Dude
Status: Online now!

* age: 26
* seeking: Anyone that respects me... at all
Relationships: Super Single
Have kids: For being an NBA player, surprisingly no
Ethnicity: Audaciously White
Body type: Gangly
Height: 6'3"
Religion: Whatever the Sioux Indians believed in
Smoke: No
Drink: My liver is frail

My Job:
Point guard for the Chicago Bulls. I used to be a respectable starter in this league, until I decided to go ghost on everyone. My production's completely dropped since I realized I was the only virgin in the Association.

Favorite Hot Spots:
I've been trying to put on some weight lately, so I can bump down low in the box. Giordano's Pizza is one of my faves (that's some badass deep dish people). I used to dig going out to the park and playing basketball with the guys out there. But since my skin color is bright even in pitch dark, I was laughed at constantly. I don't go out there anymore. I like to play in my driveway by myself, with supportive quotes being played over and over again on a loudspeaker.


For Fun:
One of my hobbies that not so many people know about is my passion for modeling. I always loved the idea of walking down a runway and strutting my stuff, but a childhood modeling accident at the age of 11 left my mind scarred so I picked up a basketball and practiced shooting threes until I got a scholarship to Kansas. It wasn't a modeling school, but it was close enough. For fun now, I like to look at myself in dresses in the mirror and work up my battered confidence. Maybe one day, I'll be able to walk down that runway again...

Favorite Things:
Basketball is alright, but I'd really like to try out the fine or maybe swimming. I really enjoy putting on makeup and imagine myself as a sexy diva.

Dislikes:
Jammed fingers? That sound Ben Wallace makes after a disappointing game? Which seems to be every game now...?

Last Read:
Danny, Don't Jump! by Hazel Townson

About Me and Who I'm Looking For:
I've got sex appeal and lots of money for a broken man. I'm looking for someone who isn't going to laugh at me anymore. I'm not a clown...

I will survive!