TOP 10 REASONS MARV LEVY IS STEPPING DOWN AS BILLS GM

by DMtShooter, Five Tool Tool

Of course, this is being reported by ESPN's Chris Mortensen... but despite that, it's still likely to be true, since it's also being reported by the Associated Press. (With Mortensen's "stories", you get a second opinion first...)

10. Too much exposure to J.P. Losman counts as elder abuse under New York state law

9. Wanted to go out on the same date as that old fart Testaverde

8. Afraid of tarnishing his leagacy of four straight Super Bowl losses

7. Keeps calling Marshawn Lynch "Thurman"

6. Tired of getting grief from the Bills office workers for wearing onions in his belt

5. Got an offer to spill the dirt on Kevin Everett in a tell-all book

4. It just stopped being about the music, man

3. Can't relate to today's players, with their millionaire paychecks, huge entourages, plastic helmets and full sets of teeth

2. Just found out that Viagra is right for him, and the trim in Buffalo is just not up to his standards

1. Unlike the rest of the people in upstate New York, doesn't want to die while watching football