DEAR RODGE

by Simon, SimonOnSports

Dear Roger,

Hey Rodge, it's Chuck, I just want to tell you I ain't gonna give you up man. I ain't gonna let them feds force me to talk about all the times you stuck things in my butt. Not no needles or your penis, I ain't tellin nobody about nothin. You can count on me.

I'm just a little worried that this could effect my Hall of Fame status. I wrote them a letter and then you saw that I got one vote right? I'm on my way to the Hall of Fame and since you don't care about that for yourself I was wondering if you can care about it for me. The way I see about it if I have two people caring about my Hall of Fame Candidacy than that's better than 1. Wait I'm off topic aren't I? Woah back to the subject.

Oh ya, I'm fleeing the scene so they won't be able to find me. Someone last ratted me out when I tried to get some fried chicken and give oral sex to a man at a New Jersey rest stop. But don't you worry it didn't take long and they haven't gotten me yet. And I'm going to our secret vacation spot, Provincetown. You remember our time their frolicking in masks during our Gay Pride Parades. Waving around our rainbow flags and of course injecting ourselves with HGH. What wonderful days. Anyway I'm probably going to be gone until all this clears so I won't give up your secrets if you don't give up mine. You know the anal warts thing, I don't want that shit to hit the public's view.

Chuckie 'Your Love Puppet' Knoblauch

PS. I miss you. Do you remember the sweet love we made on the night of that photo? I injected your penis with steroids and you rode me right through sunrise. I couldn't walk right for a month but it was the single most passionate night of my life. I mostly enjoyed giving prude Andy oral while you were riding my ass and you guys high fiving while it was going on. I miss those days. I miss you Rodge.