MATCH.COM MONDAYS: DANIEL "BOOBIE" GIBSON

by Sterling Gould, More Credible

As we make our way through this world, we're all trying to do one thing... procreate. But sometimes, it's hard to find a partner who shares the same interests as you do. I'm all about love baby, so I'll be promoting the Match.com profiles of our favorite athletes/commentators/journalists. You never know, you the reader might find the love of your life!

This Week's Featured Profile: Daniel Gibson!
Display Name: www.ilovethethree.com
Status: Online now!

* age: 21
* seeking: The respect that teammate LeBron James gathers. But with more contract deals with Spirte. Got kids to feed... eventually.
Relationships: My barber and I are pretty tight.
Have kids: No little Boobies... right now?
Ethnicity: Black
Body type: Scrawny
Height: 6' 2"
Religion: All Hail Zydrunas Ilgauskas
Smoke: Your mom
Drink: My draaaaaaank and my two-step!

My Job:
Shooting guard for the Cleveland Cavs. And the chosen savior of what the Cavs have been missing for decades. It's my job to make wide-open three point shots while opposing teams put their emphasis on LeBron (my big brother). If I can't manage to do these things, I'm usually relegated to "towel boy".

Favorite Hot Spots:
Hot spots? Cleveland doesn't get sun. It's the equivalent to Satan's Asshole. I guess if I had to choose my favorite places to go, I'd say 'anywhere I won't get mugged/raped'. Which is almost everywhere in Cleveland.

For Fun:
One of my favorite things to do was to take small clippings from Drew Gooden's "patch". That thing was atrocious. So I'd sneak up behind him while he was tieing his shoes and I'd take a small piece from it. I'd discard the hair in a corner of the shower room. If you look at it at the right angle, it kinda looks like Gizmo from Gremlins.

Favorite Things:
I love pranks, playing big in games that mean something, dogs, and chicks with pierced tongues.

Dislikes:
One thing. Jason Fucking Kapono.

Last Read:
Learning to deal with your Smallness by Robert Redfordstein

About Me and Who I'm Looking For:
I'm looking for some more hardware to add to my 2008 Rookie Challenge MVP Honors trophy at the "Casa de Gibson" (an apartment in downtown Cleveland with a lovely view).