OFFSEASON MOVES YOU MISSED: STALLWORTH’S OPTION NOT PICKED UP

by Zac, Throwing Into Traffic

Offseason Moves You Missed is a feature that will highlight the NFL offseason action that didn’t receive as much attention as it deserved.

Donte’ Stallworth has an alien in his head. At least, that’s what he told reporters. The Patriots, for what it’s worth, couldn’t care less; by all accounts, they’ll be choosing not to pick up Stallworth’s option for next year. It’s the right move, too, because while Stallworth may or may not have an alien living inside of him, that Randy Moss guy who lines up on the opposite side of the field DEFINITELY has a huge asshole living inside of him, and it will be coming out if New England fails to come up with boatloads of new contract cash. As a result, sacrifices need to be made, and Stallworth’s $6 million dollars due had the team exercised his option will be one of them.

Of course, in the machine that was the New England pass attack last season, Stallworth was the odd man out, making this process look deceptively simple. If we look again, however, I’m not so sure that the Pats would be as comfortable letting him go as reports indicate. Quick question: How does undersized, average speed white guy Wes Welker become the most popular receiver in the New England area on a team with Randy Moss? Answer: A long history of subtle, behind closed doors racism. Also answer: He led the league in receptions by beating linebackers on his routes all day, every day, and in case you’re wondering, his hands and his “great work ethic” (read: Pollyanna whiteness) aren't what’s getting him those matchups. Stallworth, a legitimate vertical threat, faced off with the cornerbacks that Welker would have had a much harder time against, and was entrusted with keeping them well downfield and away from Randy Moss. Remember, Stallworth was a year removed from getting to the playoffs with the Eagles as their number one receiver. Call me crazy, but I’m not sure I see Jabar Gaffney getting that kind of respect from defenses. As such, you can bank on New England hustling frantically to put something together that will keep Nicco the alien on their team (as if they needed another similarity to the bad guys from Independence Day).

For Stallworth, however, this move presents an even more interesting question. Unlike other Patriots receivers who have moved on from the team, Stallworth is neither too old to contribute (Troy Brown) or simply a guy who got plugged into a favorable system (Doug Gabriel, Reche Caldwell, and Deion Branch). This is a player who’s used to being a number one guy that has the wheels to immediately get an offense going vertical. Furthermore, having “2007 Patriots” on his resume certainly isn’t going to hurt when it comes to fielding offers from teams in need of a deep threat. Think Steve Smith didn’t see what Randy Moss did when he had someone else downfield to draw some attention (at least, when he wasn’t too busy choking the hell out of Dwayne Jarrett)? Even as a second option, there are teams willing to throw more money at Stallworth than he’s likely to see on the Pats, meaning that he’ll be faced with an interesting choice between taking the money or buying into the cult of New England that has made disciples of so many players up to this point (though, notably, it is harshest to wide receivers once it’s finished with them). With at least five teams besides Carolina looking to add downfield options (Oakland, New York Jets, Miami, Chicago, Minnesota), I’d be surprised if someone didn’t take notice of the fact that there’s a player who has shown an ability to immediately impact a passing game floating around, meaning Donte’ is in for a few close encounters of the cash kind.