NFL'S MATT LEHR IS GETTING STRRRRRROOOONGER!

by Sterling Gould, Staff Writer

The Dallas Morning News is reporting that former Cowboys offensive lineman Matt Lehr (currently of the New Orleans Saints) has been getting a little help to build big muscles and strong bones and whatever (are those syringes fucking smiling at me?). Apparently, Lehr's been using this stuff since 2006. Juicy!:

Jacobs told the Morning News that federal investigators confiscated a bottle he got from Lehr that contained a hair loss prevention drug that can hide steroid use. He said the bottle had an NFL team logo and Lehr’s name.

Well that was awfully nice of Mr. Jacobs to label the bottle like that. My mom used to do the same thing but my bottle was labeled "orange juice" and "Sterling (you're so special!!!)".