by DMtShooter, Five Tool Tool
As an Eagles fan, I shouldn't be happy with Dallas getting a talented corner for the low price of a 4th round pick. But as a sports blogger and a fan of Talent Over Chemistry Train Wrecks that destroy franchises? This one, Mr. Jones, could dwarf even the work of Isiah Thomas. Also, since this is now Year Two Post Parcells, the kids will really start to take advantage of Substitute Teacher Wade Phillips. Magnifique!
10. Seeing a scientific proof of just how much pull the Cowboys ownership has to get infamous reprobates off the suspended list
9. Watching Jones and Tank Johnson compile a body count during the inevitable HBO pre-season camp documentary
8. TO will have to really up his game to still get attention as the most hated player on the team/league
7. The dozens of ex-Cowboys who are now media mouth jobbers will change their wind on Jones so quickly, they might snap their necks and/or get lockjaw
6. Put it this way: the forecast calls for Rain
5. The release of Pacman's mid-season sex tape with Jessica Simpson will cause everyone in the sports blogosphere to become fabulously wealthy from the ad banners
4. Many more playmates for his "wrestling" career, both in and out of the ring
3. The unstoppable comedic potential of Pacman getting endorsement deals and commercial time
2. Someone with a camera will eventually ask Emmit Smith for his opinion on the signing, giving US espionage authorites the final interrogation tool they need to snap the will and minds of America's enemies
1. When the Cowboys lose yet another first round playoff game, stretching their streak of seasons without a playoff win to 12 and the list of consecutive playoff losses to 7, the post-game meltdown will start at tears and escalate to gunplay
Wednesday, April 23, 2008
TOP 10 BENEFITS OF PACMAN JONES GOING TO THE COWBOYS
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2 comment(s):
Fine!
As a Redskins fan, I suppose we can unite on this, if only for 5 minutes.
[I really must say congrats on the Flyers win BTW....that was a helluva series...assuming you're a Philly fan all the way]
My dream scenario:
Michael Irvin gets caught on camera by the police doing coke off Pac Man Jones' bone while Tank Johnson is in the back seat with 800 guns and several dead hookers.
Why so limited? Add in the a morbidly obese Nate Newton supplying weed, a homeless Hollywood Henderson begging for residue, and Troy Aikman wandering around concussed and pantless. Go big, sez I.
As for the Flyers, I gave up on hockey a long, long time ago -- much more fun to play it than watch it. But my relatives are into it, so, go team. Woo. My Philly fandom is Eagles/Sixers; in basbell, I go for the A's. Like anyone should care...
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