NONE OF THESE PEOPLE WILL BE COACHING THE BULLS EITHER

by E. Spencer Kyte, Bugs and Cranks

Mike D'Antoni walked away from the opportunity nearly a month ago to take on the challenge of rebuilding the Knicks.

Yesterday, Doug Collins removed his name from consideration, a week after the media reported he was the deal was pretty much done.

Today, I'd like to inform the general population that I, E. Spencer Kyte, have also decide that coaching the Chicago Bulls is not something I am interested in. I would rather have my balls clawed at by a pack of rabid wolverines than work for Jerry Reinsdorf.

Additionally, the following names can also be removed from consideration for being the coach of the Chicago Bulls next season:

• Coach Norman Dale
• Kimbo Slice
• Anyone with NBA coaching experience
  
• Big Brown
• Santa Claus
• Kanye West
• Adriana Lima

Maybe this is the coaching job Timmy Hardaway should be stumping for. I mean, he's from The Chi and the Bulls seemed to be inclined to hire someone who has never spent a minute in the big chair at the front of the line, so really, Timmy would be a perfect fit!