IT'S SETTLED, THERE IS NOTHING NOT FUNNY ABOUT IRAQ

by T, The Angry T

It seems that the great Iraqi comedians of our time like Walid Hassan and Rassim al-Jumaili have a quite a pedigree. The world's oldest written joke, dating from 1900 B.C. was written by the Sumerians in modern day Iraq.

Here is the joke, a Sumerian saying, "Something which has never occurred since time immemorial; a young woman did not fart in her husband's lap."

Although I disagree with the saying, because most of the girls I date take great pride in constantly farting around me, this was a fairly impressive attempt to humor for a comedian from 3900 years ago. Sure, it's not a hilarious boner related joke or a racially charged number that your grandpa would unleash at Thanksgiving, but its a solid start.

Not to be outdone, the Egyptians refined the art of joke telling and let this one loose in 1600 B.C, "How do you entertain a bored pharaoh? You sail a boatload of young women dressed only in fishing nets down the Nile and urge the pharaoh to go catch a fish." The fact that these people built the pyramids and sustained a civilization for 5,000 years or so is mind boggling given the terribleness of their humor.

And here come the English, late to the party, with a joke from the 10th century, "What hangs at a man's thigh and wants to poke the hole that it's often poked before? Answer: A key." There you go Nigel, that some good shit right there. I was sure they were talking about a wiener, but I'll be damned if they didn't fool me.

If those attractive, disease free gentlemen above are any indication of what's too come, the next 3,900 years should be pretty hilarious.