THE NYPD IS HELPFUL

by Sterling Gould, Staff Writer

Last night's home run derby was really good, if you're like me and gave up on audio and put the television on "mute" after hearing Chris Berman's and Joe Morgan's welcoming broadcast. In all seriousness, I'd rather have the audio from the movie "Hostile" being played over and over than hear those two bumblefucks broadcast anything. You already know about Josh Hamilton banging a 1st Round record 28 home runs, only to fall to Justin Morneau in the finals (yet, he hit more homeruns combined... make sense? No, but I won't lose any sleep over this). But it was nice to see MLB players sittin' in the grass with their snot-nosed spoiled little brats, recording every second of the Derby on their expensive camcorders, and getting enough Gatorade to fill a barren Hudson River (we get it, you guys are totally dehydrated). You know, the type of preferential treatment that us normal Joe's get. And speaking of regular Joe's, how 'bout this kid at the 2:42 video mark that was going after a ball and took a no-breather-cleaver from one of New Yorks' finest? Oh, and it's footage from Hamilton's first round... like that matters to you: (Video after the jump)