TOP 12 REASONS WHY THE US MENS BASKETBALL TEAM WON'T WIN GOLD

by DMtShooter, Five Tool Tool

12. Critical error of selecting four point guards and just three big men causes complete collapse of morale

11. Kobe's teammates just aren't talented enough

10. Refs in the medal round are from Iraq, Iran and North Korea

9. There's no way that Jason Kidd can defend Angola's Milton Barros one on one

8. Presence of Head Coach Mike Krzyzewski means that most of America will actually be rooting against the team

7. American NBA players curl into the fetal position when confonted with the horrors of zone defense

6. LeBron James and Jay-Z will be distracted by a rap battle with Sarunas Jasikevicius and Mister Sinister



5. Three point and free throw shooting always goes to hell when players have to shoot in metric

4. Can't hope to compete with Spain and Argentine's incredible "Fall Down And Cry Like A Little Girl For A Call" technique

3. USA Select team (Aaron Brooks, Channing Frye, Jeff Green, Devin Harris, Andre Iguodala, Al Jefferson, Jason Kapono, David Lee and JJ Redick) left their confidence shaken in warm-ups

2. Brutal every-other-day schedule will destroy NBA players who are used to their playoffs lasting six months

1. If things start going badly for the home team, they've got a very impressive bench