Epic Carnival: YOUR NFL ANXIETY ATTACKS HAVE NOW BEEN CURED TEMPORARILY

Monday, July 7, 2008

YOUR NFL ANXIETY ATTACKS HAVE NOW BEEN CURED TEMPORARILY

by SSReporters, Stupid Sideline Reporters

I know if you're like me, NBA season is over, the NHL season is over, the Olympics is a month away, and then you have the MLB......blech, not much going on.

Well with the help of Youtube, I've got a little surprise for you. It's the Canadian Football League! It's never had a lockout, they've been around for over 100 years, and, get this, you can celebrate touchdowns!

Here are some important things to note about the CFL:

  • 2 preseason games, usually a home and away against one team.
  • You have 3 downs, not 4, to get 10 yards.
  • The goalposts are still at the front of the end zone.
  • The end zones are about 20 yards deep.
  • The field is 110 yards from the front of one end zone to the other.
  • Conceding safeties is quite common when you're backed up.
  • Any punt, field goal (has to be a missed one), or kickoff that reaches the end zone and isn't advanced means it's a single, or 1 point.
  • It's 12 on 12, not 11 on 11.
  • An NFL kicker has a higher salary then most CFLers.
  • Because there are 8 teams, every game is on national TV.
Simple? Okay, here's highlights of the Calgary Stampeders against the Edmonton Eskimos from this past Thursday.

Rod Black and Duane Forde are the commentators.

2 comment(s):

Andrew said...

Also, don't forget that the offense can have up to 3 men in motion prior to the snap.

sager said...

Great stuff... I missed most of that game (and Hamilton's Jesse Lumsden running through the Toronto Argonauts for 189 yards in the first game of the network doubleheader) since I was at a Tragically Hip concert, but that was the excitement of the CFL right there.

The league's been a bit dominated by the defences over the past couple years, but games like that make you hope it's going to get back to the days of wide-open football.

A couple more of the rules differences:

-- The field is 65 yards wide, not 53 1/3
-- There's only 20 seconds between plays, not 40 (the timing rules are slightly different from the NFL, so teams still get the same 50-60 plays from scrimmage per game)
-- The neutral zone is larger I(one yard instead of the length of the football)
-- A fumble out of bounds goes to the team that had the last touch, not last possession
-- One foot in bounds on sideline catches


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