TOP 12 SIGNS PHILLIES FAN IS LOSING IT

by DMtShooter, Five Tool Tool

12. Losing hope that, after thirty some years on the job, the Phanatic will ever have good baseball fundamentals

11. Convinced that ESPN put them on Sunday Night Baseball against the Padres just to mock their current offensive woes

10. By reflex, still blaming Pat Burrell for everything

9. Ready to overlook everything if Brett Myers can just string together some decent starts

8. Becoming increasingly tempted to join in (or start) the traditional August "Let's Go Eagles" Chants

7. Failing to realize that team is not designed to never be more than ten games over .500

6. Quite convinced that Jimmy Rollins was never any good on the basis of one interview and his thoroughly predictable off year

5. Failing to appreciate the flat-out miracle years they are getting out of Jamie Moyer and Brad Lidge

4. Now that iPods are all the rage, doesn't have any decent sized batteries to throw

3. Not really noticing, to the extent that you might think, that Cole Hamels is beating Ryan Howard in batting average by fifty points

2. Still thinks Kyle Kendrick is gutty, rather than gut-churning

1. Campaign Cheer