Epic Carnival | Where Sports and Pop Culture Collide: Top 12 reasons the Arena Football League won't play in 2009

Top 12 reasons the Arena Football League won't play in 2009

by DMtShooter, Five Tool Tool

According to the Rocky Mountain News, the league won't play in 2009 due to weak finances (well, duh). There are, of course, other reasons why The Indoor War is finally over.

12. Once you let Philadelphia win, leagues just generally lose the will to live

11. Will open things up for the return of a hybrid USFL/XFL/WFL hybrid that will crush everything in its path

10. Honestly, having the a2 developmental league is more than enough Arena Ball for everyone

9. Right now in America, no one has any money at all

8. Shockingly low success rate for ideas coming from ex-USFL guys

7. All league revenue was tied up in buying up tickets to Jon Bon Jovi concerts, in an elaborate ruse to make the world think he doesn't actually suck worse than pancreatic cancer

6. Just can't find enough tweener guys that aren't very good at anything

5. League unable to survive with the lack of a "Madden Curse"

4. Toxic levels of ESPN involvement, since everything the Lemur touches eventually dies

3. With a high-water attendance mark of 12,415 in 2007, this isn't exactly going to be mourned for long

2. Lack of a consistent All-Star Game critically offended crap sports purists

1. Believe it or not, there is such a thing as too much offense and passing

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