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You just had to do it, didn't you? You continue to take integral pieces of my childhood, attempt to give them a new millennium sheen, and only succeed in tainting the legacy of that which I've held dear for so many years. You did it to the Ninja Turtles. You did it to Superman. And now you've done it American Gladiators. You're a heartless wench, "},"link":[{"rel":"replies","type":"application/atom+xml","href":"http://www.epiccarnival.com/feeds/1197009062557488383/comments/default","title":"Post Comments"},{"rel":"replies","type":"text/html","href":"https://www.blogger.com/comment.g?blogID\u003d1549089718489651445\u0026postID\u003d1197009062557488383\u0026isPopup\u003dtrue","title":"0 Comments"},{"rel":"edit","type":"application/atom+xml","href":"http://www.blogger.com/feeds/1549089718489651445/posts/default/1197009062557488383"},{"rel":"self","type":"application/atom+xml","href":"http://www.blogger.com/feeds/1549089718489651445/posts/default/1197009062557488383"},{"rel":"alternate","type":"text/html","href":"http://www.epiccarnival.com/2008/01/you-killed-my-american-gladiators.html","title":"YOU KILLED MY AMERICAN GLADIATORS; PREPARE TO DIE"}],"author":[{"name":{"$t":"Ray"},"email":{"$t":"noreply@blogger.com"}}],"thr$total":{"xmlns$thr":"http://purl.org/syndication/thread/1.0","$t":"0"}},{"id":{"$t":"tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1549089718489651445.post-7712454756296931396"},"published":{"$t":"2008-01-03T12:57:00.000-06:00"},"updated":{"$t":"2008-09-29T13:45:59.252-05:00"},"category":[{"scheme":"http://www.blogger.com/atom/ns#","term":"Ray"},{"scheme":"http://www.blogger.com/atom/ns#","term":"NFL"},{"scheme":"http://www.blogger.com/atom/ns#","term":"49ers"},{"scheme":"http://www.blogger.com/atom/ns#","term":"sports"},{"scheme":"http://www.blogger.com/atom/ns#","term":"mike nolan"},{"scheme":"http://www.blogger.com/atom/ns#","term":"satire"}],"title":{"type":"text","$t":"YOU'VE BEEN DOWNSIZED, MIKE NOLAN"},"summary":{"type":"text","$t":"by Ray, Flyers FieldhouseMike Nolan: Y-You wanted to see me, Mr. York?49ers Owner John York: Come on in and sit down, Mike. Can I get you anything? The usual?(Nolan nods nervously)York: Stacy, be a dear and get Mr. York two slices of white bread and a glass of milk.Nolan: No crust, please.York: I don't need to tell you that it's been a trying season, Mike. We rode in with high expectations. "},"link":[{"rel":"replies","type":"application/atom+xml","href":"http://www.epiccarnival.com/feeds/7712454756296931396/comments/default","title":"Post Comments"},{"rel":"replies","type":"text/html","href":"https://www.blogger.com/comment.g?blogID\u003d1549089718489651445\u0026postID\u003d7712454756296931396\u0026isPopup\u003dtrue","title":"0 Comments"},{"rel":"edit","type":"application/atom+xml","href":"http://www.blogger.com/feeds/1549089718489651445/posts/default/7712454756296931396"},{"rel":"self","type":"application/atom+xml","href":"http://www.blogger.com/feeds/1549089718489651445/posts/default/7712454756296931396"},{"rel":"alternate","type":"text/html","href":"http://www.epiccarnival.com/2008/01/youve-been-downsized-mike-nolan.html","title":"YOU'VE BEEN DOWNSIZED, MIKE NOLAN"}],"author":[{"name":{"$t":"Ray"},"email":{"$t":"noreply@blogger.com"}}],"thr$total":{"xmlns$thr":"http://purl.org/syndication/thread/1.0","$t":"0"}},{"id":{"$t":"tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1549089718489651445.post-4351357351023516643"},"published":{"$t":"2007-12-20T13:01:00.000-06:00"},"updated":{"$t":"2008-09-29T13:42:24.043-05:00"},"category":[{"scheme":"http://www.blogger.com/atom/ns#","term":"Ray"},{"scheme":"http://www.blogger.com/atom/ns#","term":"sports"},{"scheme":"http://www.blogger.com/atom/ns#","term":"Derek Jeter"},{"scheme":"http://www.blogger.com/atom/ns#","term":"MLB"},{"scheme":"http://www.blogger.com/atom/ns#","term":"satire"},{"scheme":"http://www.blogger.com/atom/ns#","term":"Jason Giambi"},{"scheme":"http://www.blogger.com/atom/ns#","term":"Yankees"},{"scheme":"http://www.blogger.com/atom/ns#","term":"Alex Rodriguez"}],"title":{"type":"text","$t":"INSIDE THE YANKEES' FORT: PART II"},"summary":{"type":"text","$t":"by Ray, Flyers FieldhouseA-Rod is off in his own world, playing with Tonka trucks in front of his locker. The clubhouse is dimly lit and empty. Or so he believes.Alex: Vrrrrrrrr. Beep beep beep! Move out, dump truck coming through.(Alex hears grunting coming from the bathroom.)Alex: Hey, not fair. Mr. George told me I could have playtime by myself eight hours a day. No one gets in here without "},"link":[{"rel":"replies","type":"application/atom+xml","href":"http://www.epiccarnival.com/feeds/4351357351023516643/comments/default","title":"Post Comments"},{"rel":"replies","type":"text/html","href":"https://www.blogger.com/comment.g?blogID\u003d1549089718489651445\u0026postID\u003d4351357351023516643\u0026isPopup\u003dtrue","title":"0 Comments"},{"rel":"edit","type":"application/atom+xml","href":"http://www.blogger.com/feeds/1549089718489651445/posts/default/4351357351023516643"},{"rel":"self","type":"application/atom+xml","href":"http://www.blogger.com/feeds/1549089718489651445/posts/default/4351357351023516643"},{"rel":"alternate","type":"text/html","href":"http://www.epiccarnival.com/2007/12/inside-yankees-fort-part-ii.html","title":"INSIDE THE YANKEES' FORT: PART II"}],"author":[{"name":{"$t":"Ray"},"email":{"$t":"noreply@blogger.com"}}],"thr$total":{"xmlns$thr":"http://purl.org/syndication/thread/1.0","$t":"0"}},{"id":{"$t":"tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1549089718489651445.post-4368668834375309233"},"published":{"$t":"2007-12-06T13:50:00.000-06:00"},"updated":{"$t":"2008-09-29T13:47:21.038-05:00"},"category":[{"scheme":"http://www.blogger.com/atom/ns#","term":"Ray"},{"scheme":"http://www.blogger.com/atom/ns#","term":"NFL"},{"scheme":"http://www.blogger.com/atom/ns#","term":"sports"},{"scheme":"http://www.blogger.com/atom/ns#","term":"Patriots"},{"scheme":"http://www.blogger.com/atom/ns#","term":"world powers"},{"scheme":"http://www.blogger.com/atom/ns#","term":"ESPN"}],"title":{"type":"text","$t":"THE PATRIOTS VS. HISTORY"},"summary":{"type":"text","$t":"by Ray, Flyers FieldhouseSometimes ESPN can just be so ridiculous. Why even waste all of our time at this point in the season debating whether the New England Patriots will go 19-0? It's futile. It's senseless. We all immediately know the answer to such a preposterous query.Of course they will. For they are the Patriots, and everyone else is not. Sean Salisbury taught me this.I think the real "},"link":[{"rel":"replies","type":"application/atom+xml","href":"http://www.epiccarnival.com/feeds/4368668834375309233/comments/default","title":"Post Comments"},{"rel":"replies","type":"text/html","href":"https://www.blogger.com/comment.g?blogID\u003d1549089718489651445\u0026postID\u003d4368668834375309233\u0026isPopup\u003dtrue","title":"0 Comments"},{"rel":"edit","type":"application/atom+xml","href":"http://www.blogger.com/feeds/1549089718489651445/posts/default/4368668834375309233"},{"rel":"self","type":"application/atom+xml","href":"http://www.blogger.com/feeds/1549089718489651445/posts/default/4368668834375309233"},{"rel":"alternate","type":"text/html","href":"http://www.epiccarnival.com/2007/12/patriots-vs-history.html","title":"THE PATRIOTS VS. HISTORY"}],"author":[{"name":{"$t":"Ray"},"email":{"$t":"noreply@blogger.com"}}],"thr$total":{"xmlns$thr":"http://purl.org/syndication/thread/1.0","$t":"0"}},{"id":{"$t":"tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1549089718489651445.post-5291438497454389276"},"published":{"$t":"2007-11-29T15:25:00.000-06:00"},"updated":{"$t":"2008-09-29T14:37:19.615-05:00"},"category":[{"scheme":"http://www.blogger.com/atom/ns#","term":"Ray"},{"scheme":"http://www.blogger.com/atom/ns#","term":"sports"},{"scheme":"http://www.blogger.com/atom/ns#","term":"diarrhea of the mouth"},{"scheme":"http://www.blogger.com/atom/ns#","term":"budweiser hot seat"},{"scheme":"http://www.blogger.com/atom/ns#","term":"skip bayless"},{"scheme":"http://www.blogger.com/atom/ns#","term":"stupidity"},{"scheme":"http://www.blogger.com/atom/ns#","term":"ESPN"}],"title":{"type":"text","$t":"SKIP BAYLESS IS A MASTER DEBATER"},"summary":{"type":"text","$t":"by Ray, Flyers FieldhouseAre you enjoying Skip Bayless being the newest host of the Budweiser Hot Seat? I know I am. In the absence of a wife, I need to be reminded two or three times a week while waking up that I'm an idiot. Thank goodness Skip has invaded the morning SportsCenter.I find it impossible to believe that Skip really believes what he says. There is no way one man can be so backwards,"},"link":[{"rel":"replies","type":"application/atom+xml","href":"http://www.epiccarnival.com/feeds/5291438497454389276/comments/default","title":"Post Comments"},{"rel":"replies","type":"text/html","href":"https://www.blogger.com/comment.g?blogID\u003d1549089718489651445\u0026postID\u003d5291438497454389276\u0026isPopup\u003dtrue","title":"4 Comments"},{"rel":"edit","type":"application/atom+xml","href":"http://www.blogger.com/feeds/1549089718489651445/posts/default/5291438497454389276"},{"rel":"self","type":"application/atom+xml","href":"http://www.blogger.com/feeds/1549089718489651445/posts/default/5291438497454389276"},{"rel":"alternate","type":"text/html","href":"http://www.epiccarnival.com/2007/11/skip-bayless-is-master-debater.html","title":"SKIP BAYLESS IS A MASTER DEBATER"}],"author":[{"name":{"$t":"Ray"},"email":{"$t":"noreply@blogger.com"}}],"thr$total":{"xmlns$thr":"http://purl.org/syndication/thread/1.0","$t":"4"}},{"id":{"$t":"tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1549089718489651445.post-8196415549293087917"},"published":{"$t":"2007-11-18T09:51:00.000-06:00"},"updated":{"$t":"2008-09-29T13:47:27.966-05:00"},"category":[{"scheme":"http://www.blogger.com/atom/ns#","term":"Ray"},{"scheme":"http://www.blogger.com/atom/ns#","term":"NFL"},{"scheme":"http://www.blogger.com/atom/ns#","term":"sports"},{"scheme":"http://www.blogger.com/atom/ns#","term":"NFL busts"},{"scheme":"http://www.blogger.com/atom/ns#","term":"fantasy sports"},{"scheme":"http://www.blogger.com/atom/ns#","term":"fantasy football"}],"title":{"type":"text","$t":"THE FANTASY BLACKLIST CLASS OF 2007"},"summary":{"type":"text","$t":"by Ray, Flyers FieldhouseIt's that time of year once again. Of the five fantasy football leagues I'm involved in, I am only alive in one. And \"alive\" is used in only the technical sense, as the probability of that one team pulling through lies somewhere between not bloody likely and Guns 'N Roses reunion tour.So it's once again time to get my McCarthy on and ruthlessly blacklist those players "},"link":[{"rel":"replies","type":"application/atom+xml","href":"http://www.epiccarnival.com/feeds/8196415549293087917/comments/default","title":"Post Comments"},{"rel":"replies","type":"text/html","href":"https://www.blogger.com/comment.g?blogID\u003d1549089718489651445\u0026postID\u003d8196415549293087917\u0026isPopup\u003dtrue","title":"0 Comments"},{"rel":"edit","type":"application/atom+xml","href":"http://www.blogger.com/feeds/1549089718489651445/posts/default/8196415549293087917"},{"rel":"self","type":"application/atom+xml","href":"http://www.blogger.com/feeds/1549089718489651445/posts/default/8196415549293087917"},{"rel":"alternate","type":"text/html","href":"http://www.epiccarnival.com/2007/11/fantasy-blacklist-class-of-2007.html","title":"THE FANTASY BLACKLIST CLASS OF 2007"}],"author":[{"name":{"$t":"DCScrap"},"uri":{"$t":"http://www.blogger.com/profile/06109944563728433069"},"email":{"$t":"noreply@blogger.com"},"gd$extendedProperty":{"xmlns$gd":"http://schemas.google.com/g/2005","name":"OpenSocialUserId","value":"08823360247170964835"}}],"thr$total":{"xmlns$thr":"http://purl.org/syndication/thread/1.0","$t":"0"}},{"id":{"$t":"tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1549089718489651445.post-8445826759399494749"},"published":{"$t":"2007-11-15T12:43:00.000-06:00"},"updated":{"$t":"2008-09-29T13:42:38.523-05:00"},"category":[{"scheme":"http://www.blogger.com/atom/ns#","term":"Ray"},{"scheme":"http://www.blogger.com/atom/ns#","term":"sports"},{"scheme":"http://www.blogger.com/atom/ns#","term":"Hank Steinbrenner"},{"scheme":"http://www.blogger.com/atom/ns#","term":"George Steinbrenner"},{"scheme":"http://www.blogger.com/atom/ns#","term":"MLB"},{"scheme":"http://www.blogger.com/atom/ns#","term":"satire"},{"scheme":"http://www.blogger.com/atom/ns#","term":"Yankees"},{"scheme":"http://www.blogger.com/atom/ns#","term":"Alex Rodriguez"},{"scheme":"http://www.blogger.com/atom/ns#","term":"Scott Boras"}],"title":{"type":"text","$t":"INSIDE THE YANKEES' FORT"},"summary":{"type":"text","$t":"by Ray, Flyers FieldhouseAlex Rodriguez: This is fun!Hank Steinbrenner: Shhhhh, Alex, he's going to hear.George Steinbrenner: It's alright, my boy, for this is a couch fort. And no one can pass through those cushions without knowing the secret password.Alex: What's the secret password, sir?George: (whispering) It's compromise, Alex. Compromise.Alex: Ohhhh, he'll NEVER think of that!Hank: So "},"link":[{"rel":"replies","type":"application/atom+xml","href":"http://www.epiccarnival.com/feeds/8445826759399494749/comments/default","title":"Post Comments"},{"rel":"replies","type":"text/html","href":"https://www.blogger.com/comment.g?blogID\u003d1549089718489651445\u0026postID\u003d8445826759399494749\u0026isPopup\u003dtrue","title":"1 Comments"},{"rel":"edit","type":"application/atom+xml","href":"http://www.blogger.com/feeds/1549089718489651445/posts/default/8445826759399494749"},{"rel":"self","type":"application/atom+xml","href":"http://www.blogger.com/feeds/1549089718489651445/posts/default/8445826759399494749"},{"rel":"alternate","type":"text/html","href":"http://www.epiccarnival.com/2007/11/inside-yankees-fort.html","title":"INSIDE THE YANKEES' FORT"}],"author":[{"name":{"$t":"Ray"},"email":{"$t":"noreply@blogger.com"}}],"thr$total":{"xmlns$thr":"http://purl.org/syndication/thread/1.0","$t":"1"}},{"id":{"$t":"tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1549089718489651445.post-5629312654053018746"},"published":{"$t":"2007-11-08T13:25:00.000-06:00"},"updated":{"$t":"2008-09-29T13:55:23.771-05:00"},"category":[{"scheme":"http://www.blogger.com/atom/ns#","term":"Ray"},{"scheme":"http://www.blogger.com/atom/ns#","term":"NCAA Basketball"},{"scheme":"http://www.blogger.com/atom/ns#","term":"sports"},{"scheme":"http://www.blogger.com/atom/ns#","term":"Billy Gillispie"},{"scheme":"http://www.blogger.com/atom/ns#","term":"rednecks"},{"scheme":"http://www.blogger.com/atom/ns#","term":"Kentucky"},{"scheme":"http://www.blogger.com/atom/ns#","term":"stupid fans"},{"scheme":"http://www.blogger.com/atom/ns#","term":"satire"}],"title":{"type":"text","$t":"FIRE BILLY GILLISPIE!"},"summary":{"type":"text","$t":"by Ray, Flyers FieldhouseDear Kentucky Wildcats Basketball People,Enough is enough. Will someone please stop this insanity?!I think it's become clear at this point in his tenure as the Kentucky basketball head coach that Billy Gillispie is simply not the man for the job. Billy has had every chance to prove that he was deserving of this hire, but at some point you have to cut your losses and start"},"link":[{"rel":"replies","type":"application/atom+xml","href":"http://www.epiccarnival.com/feeds/5629312654053018746/comments/default","title":"Post Comments"},{"rel":"replies","type":"text/html","href":"https://www.blogger.com/comment.g?blogID\u003d1549089718489651445\u0026postID\u003d5629312654053018746\u0026isPopup\u003dtrue","title":"3 Comments"},{"rel":"edit","type":"application/atom+xml","href":"http://www.blogger.com/feeds/1549089718489651445/posts/default/5629312654053018746"},{"rel":"self","type":"application/atom+xml","href":"http://www.blogger.com/feeds/1549089718489651445/posts/default/5629312654053018746"},{"rel":"alternate","type":"text/html","href":"http://www.epiccarnival.com/2007/11/fire-billy-gillispie.html","title":"FIRE BILLY GILLISPIE!"}],"author":[{"name":{"$t":"Ray"},"email":{"$t":"noreply@blogger.com"}}],"thr$total":{"xmlns$thr":"http://purl.org/syndication/thread/1.0","$t":"3"}},{"id":{"$t":"tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1549089718489651445.post-4312028704747840555"},"published":{"$t":"2007-10-23T13:10:00.000-05:00"},"updated":{"$t":"2008-09-29T13:43:19.134-05:00"},"category":[{"scheme":"http://www.blogger.com/atom/ns#","term":"Ray"},{"scheme":"http://www.blogger.com/atom/ns#","term":"Rockies"},{"scheme":"http://www.blogger.com/atom/ns#","term":"Jacob"},{"scheme":"http://www.blogger.com/atom/ns#","term":"Mac G"},{"scheme":"http://www.blogger.com/atom/ns#","term":"Red Sox"},{"scheme":"http://www.blogger.com/atom/ns#","term":"MLB"},{"scheme":"http://www.blogger.com/atom/ns#","term":"dswinder"},{"scheme":"http://www.blogger.com/atom/ns#","term":"Brian P. Foley"},{"scheme":"http://www.blogger.com/atom/ns#","term":"CC Rider"},{"scheme":"http://www.blogger.com/atom/ns#","term":"predictions"},{"scheme":"http://www.blogger.com/atom/ns#","term":"With Malice"},{"scheme":"http://www.blogger.com/atom/ns#","term":"sports"},{"scheme":"http://www.blogger.com/atom/ns#","term":"BD"},{"scheme":"http://www.blogger.com/atom/ns#","term":"SportsGirl365"},{"scheme":"http://www.blogger.com/atom/ns#","term":"Shorty"},{"scheme":"http://www.blogger.com/atom/ns#","term":"More Credible"},{"scheme":"http://www.blogger.com/atom/ns#","term":"Sooze"},{"scheme":"http://www.blogger.com/atom/ns#","term":"MLB playoffs"},{"scheme":"http://www.blogger.com/atom/ns#","term":"House Of Mirrors"},{"scheme":"http://www.blogger.com/atom/ns#","term":"DMtShooter"},{"scheme":"http://www.blogger.com/atom/ns#","term":"DCScrap"}],"title":{"type":"text","$t":"HOUSE OF MIRRORS: WHO WILL WIN THE WORLD SERIES?"},"summary":{"type":"text","$t":"by DCScrap, Our Book of ScrapHistory is full of great debate. Questions that remain unanswered like \"what came first the chicken or the egg?\" or \"can you get pregnant through anal?\" Luckily for you - the huddled masses - Epic Carnival is here to settle these arguments once and for all. House of Mirrors is your favorite Carnies taking a look at one another and debating the mysteries of the "},"link":[{"rel":"replies","type":"application/atom+xml","href":"http://www.epiccarnival.com/feeds/4312028704747840555/comments/default","title":"Post Comments"},{"rel":"replies","type":"text/html","href":"https://www.blogger.com/comment.g?blogID\u003d1549089718489651445\u0026postID\u003d4312028704747840555\u0026isPopup\u003dtrue","title":"1 Comments"},{"rel":"edit","type":"application/atom+xml","href":"http://www.blogger.com/feeds/1549089718489651445/posts/default/4312028704747840555"},{"rel":"self","type":"application/atom+xml","href":"http://www.blogger.com/feeds/1549089718489651445/posts/default/4312028704747840555"},{"rel":"alternate","type":"text/html","href":"http://www.epiccarnival.com/2007/10/house-of-mirrors-who-will-win-world.html","title":"HOUSE OF MIRRORS: WHO WILL WIN THE WORLD SERIES?"}],"author":[{"name":{"$t":"DCScrap"},"uri":{"$t":"http://www.blogger.com/profile/06109944563728433069"},"email":{"$t":"noreply@blogger.com"},"gd$extendedProperty":{"xmlns$gd":"http://schemas.google.com/g/2005","name":"OpenSocialUserId","value":"08823360247170964835"}}],"thr$total":{"xmlns$thr":"http://purl.org/syndication/thread/1.0","$t":"1"}},{"id":{"$t":"tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1549089718489651445.post-2425771005729175423"},"published":{"$t":"2007-10-03T13:02:00.000-05:00"},"updated":{"$t":"2008-09-29T13:43:26.649-05:00"},"category":[{"scheme":"http://www.blogger.com/atom/ns#","term":"Ray"},{"scheme":"http://www.blogger.com/atom/ns#","term":"sports"},{"scheme":"http://www.blogger.com/atom/ns#","term":"playoff beards"},{"scheme":"http://www.blogger.com/atom/ns#","term":"MLB"},{"scheme":"http://www.blogger.com/atom/ns#","term":"MLB playoffs"}],"title":{"type":"text","$t":"THE PLAYOFF BEARD MANIFESTO"},"summary":{"type":"text","$t":"by Ray, Flyers FieldhouseSo your team made it to the playoffs. Congratulations. It now comes down to a game of inches. One bad hop can radically change the course of a series. One dinged foul pole can send an entire region into euphoria, and simultaneously drive millions of others to drink themselves into illiteracy. There's no in between in playoff baseball. No gray area. This is do or die.And "},"link":[{"rel":"replies","type":"application/atom+xml","href":"http://www.epiccarnival.com/feeds/2425771005729175423/comments/default","title":"Post Comments"},{"rel":"replies","type":"text/html","href":"https://www.blogger.com/comment.g?blogID\u003d1549089718489651445\u0026postID\u003d2425771005729175423\u0026isPopup\u003dtrue","title":"0 Comments"},{"rel":"edit","type":"application/atom+xml","href":"http://www.blogger.com/feeds/1549089718489651445/posts/default/2425771005729175423"},{"rel":"self","type":"application/atom+xml","href":"http://www.blogger.com/feeds/1549089718489651445/posts/default/2425771005729175423"},{"rel":"alternate","type":"text/html","href":"http://www.epiccarnival.com/2007/10/playoff-beard-manifesto.html","title":"THE PLAYOFF BEARD MANIFESTO"}],"author":[{"name":{"$t":"Ray"},"email":{"$t":"noreply@blogger.com"}}],"thr$total":{"xmlns$thr":"http://purl.org/syndication/thread/1.0","$t":"0"}}]}});