by Gary Gaffney, MD, Steroid Nation
Not a good week for Roger Clemens. Guess you can say March came in like a lion about to pounce on the Rocket. It appears 3 governmental units will be investigating Clemens: Department of Justice, the FBI and the IRS. Why not throw in the JAGs too?
Henry Waxman's congressional committee is remanding Clemens to the Justice Dept for investigation of perjury, although the FBI admitted that it started looking into the Rocket Juice too.
The first order of business would be to ascertain the photo of Clemens at Canseco's party snapped by a dad who says his kid is in the photo with Clemens. That might be proof of Clemens attending this party where 'roids were on the menu like barbecue.
The best proof came abreast of the news: word surfaced that Debbie Clemens and Jessica Canseco compared breast augmentation jobs at the party. If that doesn't increase everyone's testosterone, then they do need injections of something -- like B12 and lidocaine.
So Clemens may get busted by breast augmentation. Not to mention he has BALCO investigator Jeff Novitzky to deal with; Novitzky is interviewing Canseco about the party. We hope Novitzky is discussing Clemens, not breast augmentation.
Congress invited the heads of the professional leagues to pow wow on steroid and PED use. There is talk of new congressional laws concerning professional anti-doping laws. One 'entertainment' bigwig didn't show, however: the WWE's Vince McMahon flipped off the congressional hearings. Just because one of McMahon's stars killed his wife, his child, and himself doesn't mean the WWE and pro wrestling has a steroids problem...does it?
Last week we learned cheerleader use the juice. This week, a new book discusses gay use of 'roids. Appearance enhancement.
We also learned this week that the players in the Negro League did not use PEDs. No juice for Josh Gibson.
Lastly it is interesting that the government prosecutors who drafted the Barry Bonds indictment for perjury were told to stay after school, and draft a new indictment. Apparently didn't spell check it well enough. The Tampa Bay Devil Rays don't care about spelling, but might care about Bonds in their lineup.
However, we learned that in 2001, Bonds set a new record for testosterone level. A normal MLB level is 0-61; Bonds's T came in at 73. Interesting...
Monday, March 3, 2008
THE 'ROID REPORT FOR THE WEEK OF FEB. 24
Tuesday, February 12, 2008
BEST USE OF PHOTOSHOP AWARD FOR FEBRUARY 12
Well done, Hugging Harold Reynolds.
If you do or see some great photoshopping in the future, send it to us and you might win ...
... some Meth in your ATM machine!
Sunday, February 10, 2008
THE 'ROID REPORT FOR THE WEEK OF FEB. 3
by Gary Gaffney, MD, Steroid Nation
Why the fascination with Roger Clemens? Three major controversies exist in American today : Who will be the Democratic and Republican nominees for president; should the country continue a military presence in Iraq; and did Roger Clemens juice with anabolic steroids and HGH?
Since the Red Sox/Blue Jays/Yankees/Astros superstar found himself on the roster of the Mitchell Report, the Rocket's life both fascinated and repulsed sports fans all across the globe. The daily Clemens update pushed former media front-runner Barry Bonds's legal maneuvering off the sports pages this week.
Congress invited all the main characters in the Clemens's episode to the Capitol Hill for a chat. Clemens's fame overrides his potential 'roided infamy as he schmoozed members of Congress, spreading the political jelly and jam. ESPN puts together multiple specials revolving around the Clemens situation as Clemens commands a '60 Minutes' interview. The Clemens news overwhelms the beginning of baseball spring training 2008.
This love-hate triangle of Clemens-McNamee-Pettitte exponentially expanded this week when Brian McNamee -- the Clemens and Pettitte trainer who claims he injected Clemens with Rocket fuel -- produced syringes and medical paraphernalia he says accumulated from Rocket injections. McNamee then shockingly claimed he injected Debbie Clemens with HGH to enhance her appearance for a revealing photo shoot in 2003.
Ultimately the Clemens episode fits perfectly in an American gone blood drunk on image, youth, and celebrity. Clemens salivates to capture the spotlight. Born with great athletic ability, Clemens's competitive zeal and his amazing athletic longevity combined with a fanaticism for grueling workouts seemed to testify to what can be accomplished with talent and hard work. The family -- gorgeous blond wife and 4 strapping children -- also speaks to the feel-good halo that surrounds the most luminous of heroes: great men on the athletic field attract gorgeous women and loyal fan adulation off the field.
The chink in the amour appeared long ago. Clemens was an athlete who threw a shattered bat at a competitor he could not beat (competitive spirit or 'roid rage?). Clemens manipulated a system that allowed him to come in late to spring training, and picnic away from the park every day he didn't pitch. Teams jumped to compensate Clemens far beyond what appeared to be his worth as an aged, itinerant pitcher carrying his carpet bag to supply wins to what every team bid the highest for the vagrant athlete.
The revealing photo-shoot radiated weird vibes too. Roger Clemens (along with Mark McGwire) as the stud with the gorgeous, well-built mother-of-four blond towering over him. Gratuitous? Excessive? How does this almost 40 year-old mother of 4 look like she has a figure of 19 year-old body-builder/model? How many women -- at any age -- sport a voluptuous bust-line with a 6-pack abdomen? Is this a little too Anna Nicole Smith-like?
The breasts of the Clemens and McGwire women look artificial, and now Brian McNamee gives us a suspicion that the abdomen, and the leanness of the Mrs. may also also be artificial. Perfect: the muscles and stamina and the longevity of the athletic stud may be steroids and HGH enhanced, as the bust and the 6-pack of the beauty may be fake too.
The Clemens represent the ultimate American family. Multi-millionaire husband who will enter the Hall of Fame as one of the greatest pitchers in MLB history; Gorgeous stacked wife who raised 4 wonderful children, and who engages in multiple works of charity. Picture-perfect.
This American hero/American myth is not going away easily. The king will not abdicate the thrown of image and appearance without a vicious media and legal fight. That fight has now moved to the Congressional stage, where even the nation's lawmakers swoon over the strapping Texan as he moves the PR machine to Capital Hill. Will US Congressmen sell their Clemens autograph on EBay?
Friday, February 8, 2008
MCNAMEE: I INJECTED ROGER CLEMENS' WIFE WITH HGH
According to a Washington source, former trainer Brian McNamee told congressional investigators that he injected Roger Clemens' wife, Debbie, with HGH before she appeared with Roger in Sports Illustrated's swimsuit issue in 2003.
[Debbie Clemens] discussed the photo shoot on her Web site.
"Roger came to me one day and told me that we had been asked to do a photo shoot for Sports Illustrated," Debbie Clemens recalls. "I had major anxiety! I was a 39-year-old mother of 4! Once I realized that this WAS going to be a reality, I decided I had to give it everything I had."
"My mind was set," Debbie Clemens continued. "I am not a risk taker, but have since learned that with great risk, sometimes comes great reward. The responses from that experience have been wonderful and I feel it was a turning point in my life. It's nice to have a goal for yourself and to see it through. The goal kept me motivated and focused. Using common sense and my ability to balance my life, I achieved that goal."
McNamee says that he injected her with HGH at Roger Clemens' direction. Wow. Just wow.
Better get to practicing that perp walk, Roger. I'd say you are officially retired now.
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