by WCT, The Ship of Fools
This year's NBA postseason was quite a learning experience for basketball fans. We learned that NBA refs fix games (well, this postseason let us further know that NBA refs fix games), and we learned that Boston has some douche-y sports fans. Hmm, maybe these playoffs didn't teach us that much new stuff after all. In any case, even if we knew most of the ancillary stuff that goes along with the NBA, we did learn a lot of actual basketball information. Lets take a quick recap of the on-the-court stuff we learned since the first-round series tipped off way back in February (it was February right? Or does it only seem like it has been that long?)
We can stop with the whole "Kobe=Michael" nonsense - Kobe deserved the MVP award, because it was a regular season award, and Kobe lifted the play of his teammates during the year in a way that no one thought he could. But if you think that Michael Jordan would ever, ever allow his team to be embarrassed by almost 40 points in a close-out game, you're crazy. If you think that Michael would ever, ever allow his team to blow a 20+ point lead in a pivotal Finals game (at home!) you're nuts. Kobe allowed both to take place. In the same series. These playoffs taught us that Kobe probably doesn't even compare to LeBron James. James, with an equally garbage supporting cast (if not worse) pushed the Celtics to 7 games in a hard-fought series. In fact, in the Cavs-Celts series, it took a missed gimme in the final seconds for the Celtics to win game 1, and an other-worldly performance by Paul Pierce for the Celtics to win game 7. Otherwise, that was a very close series. The Lakers, on the other hand, got their doors blown off in the Finals.
Kobe is a great, great player, and there is no shame in not being as good as Michael Jordan. In fact, it is probably unfair that MJ is the measuring stick for Kobe just because they play the same position, and have won a lot of titles under Phil Jackson. But the fact is, those comparisons should stop.
A lot of people were wrong in picking the winner in this series - The ease with which the Celts disposed of the Lakers was a surprise, but the actual outcome should not be. What should be surprising is the number of people that picked the Lakers before the Finals began. The Celtics were the best team in the NBA record-wise for the entire season, and beat LA in their only regular season meetings. Why is everyone so surprised? Most thought that the Celtics record was inflated due to a weak Eastern Conference, which segues perfectly into the next thing we learned...
The Eastern Conference is AT LEAST as good as the West, if not better - For years, conventional NBA wisdom has been, the West is better, the East is weak. All record and accomplishments in the East should come with a disclaimer, blah blah blah. No more my friends. The Lakers series was by far the easiest series the Celtics had to win this postseason. The goddamn Hawks provided more resistance than the Lakers did.
The eventual champs were pushed to 7 games against Atlanta, 7 games against Cleveland, and the 6 game series with Detroit included three single-digit Celtic wins. The Lakers waltzed through a pathetic Denver team, a very good Utah team, and an old-looking group of San Antonio Spurs. The Finals were never in doubt. The Lakers had a historic collapse in game 4, were very lucky to win games 3 & 5, and were absolutely destroyed in game 6. I'm sorry, you can no longer make the argument that the West is better.
The Lakers are soft - First of all, congratulations to the Celtics. They deserve all of the accolades for winning the championship this year, their 17th in the 62 years of their existence (27% of all championships awarded in that time. Not even the Yankees can claim that kind of dominance) and I do not want this rant to take anything away from them.
That said, the way the Celtics pushed the Lakers around inside was laughable. Pau Gasol's scoring went from 22 points per game against Denver, to 14 against Boston (including 11 in game 6), Vladimir Radmanovic is 6-10 and averaged fewer that 5 rebounds per game, Lamar Odom seemed to disappear in the fourth quarters of games, and the "defense" that Sasha Vujacic played on Ray Allen, in the closing seconds of game 4, when the Lakers absolutely positively needed a stop, was a disgrace. Without so much as a crossover dribble, Allen blew by Vujacic like he was nailed to the floor. The Celtics embarrassed the Lakers for the better part of the entire 6 game series.
Friday, June 20, 2008
WHAT THESE NBA PLAYOFFS TAUGHT US
Wednesday, June 18, 2008
TOP 10 CONSOLATIONS FOR BOSTON HATERS
by DMtShooter, Five Tool Tool
10. Despite the Celtics' win, Boston Fan still sees David Tyree in his nightmares
9. Admit it, you hated rooting for Kobe Bryant just like everyone else
8. Many, many people in the Commonwealth will be paying for this in the afterlife
7. Boston Fan did boo the hell out of Stuart Scott and David Stern even in their moment of triumph, which was kind of cool
6. Paul Pierce's knee woes means that there's no way the Celtics can repeat, since he's really, really, really hurt
5. Phil Jackon getting outcoached by Doc Rivers means you don't have to hear about what a genius he is anymore
4. It could always be worse -- you could (well, at least theoretically) be a Timberwolf fan
3. You don't have to see any more of those heavy rotation ads that have made you want to find and disembowel Mike Myers
2. There is a very real chance that Bill Simmons will spontaneously combust
1. Now that we all know there is no God, it opens up a lot of, shall we say, possibilities, for the rest of our lives
Monday, June 16, 2008
I WILL FEAST ON BLOOD
by Tracer Bullet, Staff Writer
I'm not much of one for the NBA. It's great that these freakishly tall would-be felons have a place to go instead of lounging around my neighborhood harassing schoolchildren, but really, who gives a crap? The refs are crooked, the fundamentals are abysmal and the whole thing hasn't been any fun since Sir Charles retired.
As such, I don't care at all about the (interminable) Finals. Normally I root for whichever team wins Game 1 because that's the only way I'll get a sweep and basketball will be over. At least until the next season starts in three months.
But (and you knew there was a "but" coming) not this year. Now that the Lakers have dragged their pitiful selves off the mat, I want blood.
I want the Lakers to crush them, to drive the Celtics before them, to hear the lamentations of their women.
Why? You ask? Because f*ck Boston. That's why.
Sure, KG deserves a ring after so many years in the wilderness and Ray Allen seems a decent chap. This isn't about them. This is about Boston. I hate Boston. I hate the Patriots. I hate the Red Sox. I hate the Celtics. If I cared, I'd even hate the Bruins.
I hate the beans. I hate the brown bread. I hate the Brahmins.
The only thing I don't hate about Boston is Bill Russell and he really hated Boston.
This fetid hole that imagines itself the Hub of the Universe and the grubby pig-men who populate its pestilence-ridden streets has had an undeserved run of athletic success lately. Three (stolen, shh) Super Bowls and two World Series this decade to go along with one of the most successful franchises in all of sports.
These subhumans call this the rubber match. They won a World Series and lost a Super Bowl (hee-hee) in the past 12 months, so the NBA is the tiebreaker. And I want it to break their hearts.
Oh, the poetic justice of a Boston team choking away a 3-1 lead. The streets will run as rivers with tears of unfathomable sadness. It can happen, Lakers. You must believe.
It's not enough that the Celtics lose. I want them to lose this series on the most ridiculous, insane, impossible-to-duplicate play known to man.
I want Bryant to get open on a no-call so egregious, so blatantly unfair that Red Auerbach slithers from the Neverending Pit of Despair where wraiths tear away chunks of his flesh and stabs David Stern in his eyes. I don't want Jordon on Ehlo, I want Bryant to put a Brazilian jiu-jujitsu move on Allen that leaves the Celtics guard in a twitching heap.
I want Washington vs. Tomjanovich up in this bitch.
I want Kobe Bryant to hit the most bizarre, 45-foot, falling away desperation heave to win Game 7. I want to hear nothing but the soft "twhip" of leather clearing nylon, followed by the unbearable anguish of millions.
This is my solemn vow: Kobe, if you make this happen, my wife's asshole is all yours.
TOP 10 NBA FINALS QUESTIONS
by DMtShooter, Five Tool Tool
This, by the way, is Epic Carnival Post #3000, which means that TONIGHT, WE DINE IN HELL! (Oh, crap. That's for post 300? Well, screw me with Chris Mihm. Or Lakers Fan, for that matter...)
10. Given that the Celtics' glaring weakness is at point guard, why haven't the Lakers tried full court pressure?
9. Is there some rule that prevents any of the Laker bigs from dunking the ball in traffic?
8. Since the television timeouts are making a two hour game last three hours, why do both coaches feel compelled to play deep bench players?
7. Will the Laker fans ever stop chanting M-V-P, no matter how weakly Kobe Bryant plays in comparison to Paul Pierce?
6. What are the odds on anyone thinking, at any moment before the last week, that the absence of Kendrick Perkins would be a factor in an NBA Finals?
5. Since when did Paul Pierce decide to be better than both LeBron James and Kobe Bryant, and why have both of those players decided to be OK with that?
4. Why does every analyst seem to think that Kobe Bryant needs more help, if he's the best player in the world?
3. What idiot devised the travel schedule that dictates that there was two days between Games 1 and 2 in Boston, and two days between Game 5 in Los Angeles and Game 6 in Boston?
2. How is it that the coach with nine rings (the Lakers' Phil Jackson) has the team that can't come out of the halftime break without (usually) getting owned?
1. If the Celtics somehow gag up this series, will that be an even bigger disappointment to Boston Fan than Eighteen And One Very Big One?
Saturday, June 14, 2008
TOP ELEVEN LAKER REASONS FOR BLOWING A 24-POINT LEAD
by DCScrap, on 205th magazine
... or, How We Wrecked Our Season Without Really Trying.
TWO VERY DIFFERENT PEOPLE IN THE SAME BALLHYPE GROUP
by Ethanator1088, NESW Sports
Most people that love basketball and love Ballhype, played the Ballhype 2008 NBA Playoff Pick'em Game. I did and I am getting spanked! That shows what I know. I had Kobe and his crew to choke in the first round. It looks like I chose the wrong round, but I did pick the Celtics to win it all. That shows what I know.
This post is about two very different people from the Ballhype group Golden State of Mind. It is one of the bigger groups sitting at 146 members. The two members are Juicewu and Invinceible. The links on their names do not go to their profiles. They go to their 2008 NBA Playoff Pick'em brackets. Check them out. Yep, they both have perfect brackets up to this point. The only difference is the winner they have chosen.
Besides choosing a new way to spell invincible, Invinceible went the rout of the homer. He was literally in the Golden State of Mind. I am not picking on him. I completely understand. If there was an NBA team from Alabama, I would most likely pick them as well. :-) My misspellings are also well documented.
This is just a little early congratulatory post for Juicewu. Thanks for not being a homer. Thanks for seeing that 3 of the best players in the NBA can beat Kobe. Kobe tried to take over the game. He did not involve Pau and Lamar and they let him do it. Those two guys are great, but they do not display a killer instinct.
Garnett, Allen, and Pierce all have that killer instinct, but they choose to let others shine. Sometimes they let Perkins or Rondo shine. If Perkins and Rondo played with the Lakers, they would be very small pieces to the Kobe puzzle. It is a very different team and team concept.
It looks like Juicewu is going to end with a 5 player tie for 1st place.
One of them, or all of them will win an 8 gigabyte iPod touch. That is pretty cool. Thanks Jason and Erin!
Monday, June 9, 2008
TOP 12 REASONS WHY THE CELTICS SHOT 28 MORE FREE THROWS THAN THE LAKERS IN GAME TWO
by DMtShooter, Five Tool Tool
12. It's all the get-even for that Jon Barry no-call against the Spurs
11. Paul Pierce keeps telling them about how much his knee hurts, and they are feeling really sorry for him
10. Leon Powe always gets the calls at home
9. Kobe Bryant's MVP Card was lost in the mail, and the referees aren't taking the award on faith
8. Doc Rivers, as expected, is getting more run from the zebras than Phil Jackson
7. The Lakers have too many white guys, and white guys never get the benefit of any doubt
6. It's hard to put Kobe on the line when he's shown less interest in driving the lane than in driving on underaged hotel workers
5. Commissioner Stern has let it be known that he's looking for a nice, long ratings-friendly series
4. Every time the refs think about calling a foul on Boston, Kevin Garnett does that crazy man screaming thing
3. Refs just want to be sure that something nice finally happens for Boston Fan
2. It's hard to call fouls on the home team, because then the fans boo you and do that "bull sh*t" chant, and that just makes all referees cry
1. Lakers have forgotten that when you can't play defense, you really need to start flopping
Thursday, June 5, 2008
THE NEW DARK KNIGHT TRAILER WITH KOBE AND KG
by DCScrap, on 205th magazine
Guess which one is Batman and which one is The Joker. And be sure to catch Phil Jax as Alfred.
Thanks to superawesome reader Shane for the vid.
Wednesday, June 4, 2008
TOP 10 AIR-TIGHT, DEAD SOLID CERTAIN PREDICTIONS FOR THE NBA FINALS
by DMtShooter, Five Tool Tool
10. At some point, you will wonder if the referees are "pulling a Donaghy" to ensure a longer, more advertising lucrative series
9. Some talking head will expound on the importance of "closing out quarters" without any shred of statistical evidence that those minutes are more important than any other
8. Kobe Bryant, Paul Pierce, Kevin Garnett, Ray Allen or Pau Gasol will get their third or fourth foul, which will lead to very concerned noises from the announcing team, like a superstar has ever fouled out of an NBA playoff game
7. There will be many of those never tiresome "Gosh, Celebrities and Athletes From Other Sports Go To These Games And Sit In Remarkably Better Seats Than Everyone Else" montages
6. The telecast will show you just enough cheerleader footage to let you know they are there, but not enough to work up a good wank (that is what they are there for, right?)
5. A color analyst will praise a coach for taking a timeout, as if this was a spectacular stratagem, evidence of genius, or act that has more than a 0.01% chance of actually impacting the outcome of the game
4. There will be enough '60s and '80s footage to convince you that nothing of importance has happened in the Association since the last time these teams met in the Finals, and that the Association only has fans of these teams
3. Regardless of the quality of play and score, all on-air analysis will celebrate how great of a game it was
2. No one with an on-camera microphone will mention the impact of extra commercials
1. A flagrant foul will be called on a play where a large player fouls a small player, where the same foul against a large player won't be called
Monday, June 2, 2008
TOP 11 REASONS WHY THE NBA NEEDED SIX DAYS OFF BEFORE THE FINALS
by DMtShooter, Five Tool Tool
11. Media needs time to work out Rambis-McHale, Bryant-Allen, Auerbach-Jackson and Douchebag Fan - Douchebag Fan rivalries
10. No one could have forseen the Conference Finals ending in five and six games, even though that's what usually happens
9. Gives national advertisers more time to try to make the audience forget about Kobe Bryant's (alleged) wacky anal raping shenanigans
8. Doc Rivers requested the time to figure out just how he's going to outsmart Phil Jackson
7. Most NBA fans still in "House of Payne / The Closer / Saving Grace / Bill Engvald" detox
6. Many fans of the Lakers and Celtics longtime rivals (Spurs, Pistons, Sixers, Rockets, etc.) need time to be educated about how all of their playoffs against either team were meaningless in comparison to this rivalry
5. Timberwolf and Grizzly fans haven't had enough time for the salt to sit in the wounds over the Garnett and Gasol "trades"
4. The longer they wait, the less time that the country will have only baseball to distract it from the start of football season
3. Don't think of it as six days between games -- think of it as just the first of many, many, many commercial breaks
2. David Stern requires this time to go to each and every Seattle Supersonics fan's house to deliver a flaming bag of feces
1. Just want to make sure that both teams are rusty as hell for Game One, and that bench depth matters not at all
Friday, May 30, 2008
SEAL THE DEAL! KEEP THE EVIL OUT!
by Sterling Gould, Staff Writer
Game 6. Tonight. In the PAH-PAH-PAH-PALACE (or however that wanna-be And 1 Basketball tour announcer dude says it). Last night, the Lakers ended David Stern's wet dream of another San Antonio/Detroit NBA Finals match up. Much thanks to Kobe's 39 points and Pau Gasol's 12 and 19 night. San Antonio fans, otherwise known as "Al Qaeda Supporters" amongst myself and an esteemed group of NBA followers, will have to wait another time for an attempt at a "repeat" in order to cement their so-called "dynasty". I won't be subjected to Tim Duncan's boring ass 8 foot jumper off of the glass, Manu's Italian Soccer-esque like mid-court flops, Tony Parker's pick and roll layups to the dish (granted, he does have a sick spin move), and Gregg Popovich's always contorting face (the scar tissue is alive!). And does anyone else agree that Bruce Bowen is one of the contributors to the ever-rising epidemic of "Bro Rape"?
Stern's Soldier's have been put to rest. All this crap about "fundamental basketball" and "group of professionals" is being put away, and is instead being replaced by a veteran superstar, his new gigantic counterpart, and a cast of scrappy, young players. Now, we can witness Boston give the basketball nation... nay, the basketball world into orgasm by shutting down the Pistons tonight. For a team I used to like (not like, followed them as a fan, but admitted I had no harsh feelings against them), the Pistons have become pretty boring and predictable. Right down to the very offense they run, which seems to require Rip Hamilton rolling off of some screen for a 15-18 foot jumper... incessantly. Chauncy Billups' has been more like Chauncy Fucksups, begging the question should I even call him "The Horse" anymore (just see how he looks in this lighting). Tayshaun Prince is quiet and is waiting for the mothership to return him to his home planet any day now (his parents watch him from their home on Saturn, thanks to ESPN's space broadcasts), Antonio Mcdyess is a whiny bitch, and 'Sheed just isn't funny anymore. Oh, and Flip Saunder's has some nice fucking ties. What's this all about really? Just kind of a reminder for all of us out there that enjoy the playoffs:
KEEP BORING SHIT OUT OF THE FINALS.
I want pizazz and sparks for my climax. Not that feeling of dissatisfaction and loneliness, which seems to follow after every sexual encounter for me nowadays. Stern, don't have any of your officiating flunkies give the Pistons the game tonight because of questionable calls Wednesday night. For once, be consistent with giving one team the screw job and the other the glory. BUT FOR THE COOL TEAM.
Wednesday, May 28, 2008
NBA: WHERE POOR OFFICIATING HAPPENS
by SSReporters, Stupid Sideline Reporters
Hey everybody, it's my first post here, glad to join the Carnival.
A reallllly slow sports day however abruptly ended when the Spurs used their inept shooting and poor rebounding play to never lead in the game yet lose just 93-91 at home to the Lakers. The defending champs are down 3-1 in the series and are pretty much done, so no Spurs/Pistons to send the ABC execs to suicide watch.
It was an enjoyable game to watch (that's right, a Spurs game was enjoyable to watch because the other team is exciting), but it will be marred by the once again crap officiating that the NBA brings to the table. After the jump here are some bullet points where I saw some really poor decisions by Joey Crawford, Mark Wunderlich, and Joe Forte (mostly on the Lakers).
* Towards the end of the first quarter, Tim Duncan stormed his way for a powerful dunk. Somehow the refs figured that 3 Duncan steps = 2 human steps and no travel was called.
* The 2nd and 3rd quarter saw the Spurs get blocking fouls outside of the restricted zone even if a Lakers player is standing his ground for 5 seconds. The Lakers got nothing.
* Jordan Farmar got grabbed at least 2 times by Tony Parker at the end of the 3rd, no call.
* Before I get accusations of bias, the Lakers got away with some things. When Kobe Bryant stupidly shot with :18 on the shot clock leading to a Spurs fastbreak, Parker was clearly fouled by Fisher (which would've been his 5th IIRC). Instead, Joey Crawford (remember him Duncan?) gave no foul and counted Tony's basket, a goaltend by Lamar Odom.
* I've looked at that several times now, that is not even close to being a goaltend. Odom trapped it along the backboard and Parker should've gotten two shots.
* Now the final play of the game, 2.1 to go, season on the line. The slam dunk champion himself pump faked, D-Fish bit (ba-dum-cha), and there was clear contact. Barry puts up a prayer three after the contact that went wide right and that is the ball game.
The problem I have with that last play, is that should've been two shots, not three. No stupid continuation garbage at all, the Lakers were in the penalty, and it was clear Barry was trying to get a foul called and Popovich was trying to bait the Lakers D into thinking they were going for the win. Fisher had his elbow on Barry's back, and even though Barry made a terrible decision not to just force up a shot and go for 3 free throws, one of the refs should've blown the whistle, and call Fisher for his 6th foul (see above point).
The NBA has become bush league as far as officiating, they won't let them play anymore and when they do let them play it should be a foul. Who knows? Maybe Donaghy is right. Maybe other refs are into fixing these games as well because last night gave me a wild suspicion they tried to make this as long a series as possible.
Alright, onto the game.
What can I say, the Spurs put themselves in a position they shouldn't have been in. They tied the game 5 times yet every time they went for the lead, they shot a three. They went 7-24 from downtown and Barry took half of them. It's obvious San Antonio lives by the three pointer and that's what costing them the series.
LA completely shut down Tony Parker's usual drive to the basket and made him a jump shooter, Manu Ginobili went 1-7, Robert Horry is afraid to shoot now, it's basically Duncan and Barry picking up the slack of the rest of their teammates.
Even with all of that domination by the Lakers, the Spurs were gifted a chance to win because they went to the line 500 times. But they couldn't knock down a three when it mattered, they couldn't make the big shots, and their imminent doom comes on Thursday night.
Thoughts on last night? Because clearly the Spurs had the chance because the Lakers wilted under pressure (AGAIN!! Remember the Utah game 6?), couldn't close the game out, and should've won.
But, should've is the key word, bye bye boring San Antonio, and Pau Gasol, meet your first ever NBA Finals.
(Photo from Getty Images and Stephen Dunn)
Monday, May 12, 2008
CALLING YOU OUT! - UTAH JAZZ FANS
by WCT, The Ship of Fools
“Calling You Out!” is a periodic segment where WCT takes people to task for irresponsible journalism, foolhardy activities, or just general douchebaggery. Nothing is sacred, no one is spared, watch your ass mister! You could be next!
Today - A group of utterly classless fans
Those that know me, know that when it comes to the NBA, I am partial to the Cleveland Cavs. No, I did not jump on the bandwagon during the "LeBron James Renaissance," I have (unfortunately) been cheering for the Cavs since the days of Mark Price, Craig Ehlo, and Hot Rod Williams, back at the old Richfield Coliseum. So in terms of the Eastern Conference, that's where my loyalty lies. In terms of the Western Conference, I have just been watching as a casual fan. But now I know who I will be cheering against.
First lets take a step back. Without a doubt, the story of last season's Western Conference playoffs was the emotional roller coaster endured by then-Jazz guard Derek Fisher. During the second-round, Fisher was forced to leave the team to be with his infant daughter, who had been diagnosed with a rare form of eye cancer. After his daughter's condition improved to the point where her life was no longer in immediate danger, Fisher left his family, flew back to Salt Lake City, came directly to the arena, rejoined the team in the middle of a game, and hit a key 3-pointer in an overtime win.
During the off-season, it was determined that Fisher's daughter would need more treatment to fight her cancer, and Utah simply did not have the facilities that she needed. With that, Fisher asked Utah management to let him out of his contract so that he could go to a team in a bigger market with better medical facilities. As a result, he returned to the Lakers last summer, and his daughter began taking treatment in L.A.
So how did Utah Jazz fans respond, when Fisher returned to Utah (coincidentally, exactly a year to the day from his heroic return in the '07 playoffs) with the Lakers for game 3 of this year's Western Conference Semis? They booed him. They booed him when his name was announced with the starting lineups, they booed him when he was on the free throw line, and they booed him the first few times he touched the ball early in the game. Nice.
So I don't know about you, but for the foreseeable future, I will be cheering against the Utah Jazz. Not because of anyone on the team (although I'm not crazy about Carlos Boozer, but that's a whole other story), but because I think their classless, callous fans don't deserve to have a winner. I'm not saying that they have to give the guy a standing ovation every time he scratches his butt, but would it kill them to boo the other 11 Lakers and just sort of give Fisher a pass?
Wednesday, March 26, 2008
KOBE BRYANT IS MORE IMPORTANT THAN HE IS VALUABLE
by HP, Hardwood Paroxysm
In my opinion, LeBron James has been the most valuable player in the NBA this season. He's been more valuable than Kobe Bryant this season. (I hate that I'm forced into qualifying that statement with "In my opinion" but at this point, that's pretty much the difference between the two.)
James scores more points, grabs more rebounds, dishes more assists, and blocks more shots. He is able to score in a variety of ways that resembles transcendence more and more each day. He keeps his wretched micturation of a team in the playoffs, and manages to do all of this while defenses are completely centered on him.
But I say all this in order to preface this.
Kobe Bryant is the most important player in the NBA.
First, take a second and recognize the depth of this statement coming from someone that equates Kobe Bryant the basketball player with influenza, wasps, the second Bush album, and Artificial Intelligence. The world would simply be better without them. However, not even my own undeniable disgust towards Mr. Bean is enough to overcome the truth of the matter.
I've rattled it around my brain what the new look Lakers would look like without Bryant. With Gasol, Fisher, Farmar, Vujacic, Bynum (when healthy) and Odom, that sounds like a pretty damn good team. But it's only in the context of surrounding Kobe. He's so far beyond the concept of the most important player on his team that he embodies the team at this point. Everything good that the Lakers accomplish can be attributed to Bryant once again rising his game to another level, even if it's not in the boxscore but in the clutch or in the huddle. And every time the Lakers fail, it's when Kobe's weaknesses rise to the surface. He'll shoot 30 to 4o shots and press too much. The Lakers live and die by how Kobe Bryant breathes in and out.
No other player carries as much weight as Bryant does. Even more so than LeBron, all eyes are on Kobe when he's in a room or on the court. He's transcendent in the concept of being famous. He's come to embody something that is wholly his own. He's not beloved. He's not despised. He's simultaneously both. He bears such a huge weight in the balance of the NBA. Bryant can single handedly end someone's season, can shift playoff standings, can affect contract negotiations. He has more impact on the league than anyone.
Kobe's not only the most valuable team on the Lakers, not only is he the most important player in the league, he's the most important player to the league. Kobe is must-watch-basketball on a nightly basis especially because he's so divisive. No one is ambivalent towards Kobe. He's either a hero or a demon. He's never the source of apathy. Everyone cares. And that's all the front office cares about. You can despise Kobe with all the passion of a Baptist revival, and it 's fine because that just means you're watching. And as long as you're watching, he's making them money. LeBron may be the most valuable, but he doesn't inspire, doesn't intrigue, doesn't force us to obsess over him the same way. He's an icon in the purest sense. He's not an icon of good, nor of evil. He doesn't represent the best things about the game, nor the worst. He isn't a pillar of grace nor a despicable waste of human space. He's so painfully human he manages to encompass something we all identify with, even as we tend to revolt against the worse parts of the character he chooses to show.
I think what I've learned most about Bryant this season is how human he is. MJ, and now LeBron, have sculpted in this new media age an implacable public force. Every interview, every commercial, every poster dunk is carefully designed to sculpt the global icon their PR crews have designed. Non-controversial. Clean-cut. Friendly. And I think Kobe and his crew would love it if they could market him in this way. But they can't. His arrogance and his insecurity bleeds through the television and into our minds. It's entirely possible that Kobe is a humble, yet politely confident guy in real life. But that's not how he comes off. He comes off as a smug punk that is constantly seeking approval from the very subsect of humanity that vilifies him and doubts him as a rightful heir to the throne of best player on Earth. And that both intrigues and irritates us. And that's what makes him so important. He's this bizarre new age embodiment of the populace. Smug and neurotic, obsessed and dedicated.
Kobe Bryant is the most important player in the NBA.
Monday, March 24, 2008
BEST USE OF PHOTOSHOP AWARD FOR MARCH 24
Well done, Tony.psd via Golden State of Mind.
If you do or see some great photoshopping in the future, send it to us and you might win ...
... some free fast food!
Thursday, March 13, 2008
BEST USE OF PHOTOSHOP AWARD FOR MARCH 13
Props to The Angry T.
If you do or see some great photoshopping in the future, send it to us and you might win ...
... an at-bat with the New York Yankees!
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