by DMtShooter, Five Tool Tool
Next year, the NBA will institute fines for "clear cases of flopping." But since most NBA playes are (a) exceptionally compensated, and (b) employed by teams that clearly don't mind the flopping, since they more or less have hired them to do it... I'm not thinking a fine is going to really matter. So, with our constant Carnie mission statement to make the world better, dammit, here's some ideas for alternate punishment.
10. Revocation of the mandatory "Get Even" call following bad calls against the player or his team
9. Replacing their primo weed with skunk
8. Web cams that can't be turned off, installed in hotel rooms for spouses
7. Have to borrow money from Charles Oakley
6. Deportation to home country, since this seems to be a very European and South American problem
5. Special frilly "skort" uniform for repeat offenders
4. Required to play next game while wearing a bike helmet and a pillow tied to the ass
3. Any sneaker endorsements forcibly replaced with athletic flip-flops
2. Technical fouls, since flopping is, um, unsportsmanlike
1. Mandatory MRIs and full physicals after each and every flop, since we don't want to run the risk of concussion for these poor clumsy souls
Showing posts with label flop. Show all posts
Showing posts with label flop. Show all posts
Thursday, May 29, 2008
TOP 10 ALTERNATE PUNISHMENTS FOR FLOPPING
Sunday, April 27, 2008
TOP 10 THINGS WE DID NOT KNOW BEFORE WATCHING THE NBA PLAYOFFS THIS WEEKEND
by DMtShooter, Five Tool Tool
10. George Karl will return to pretend to coach the Nuggets again next year
9. The Spurs really didn't want to clinch at home
8. Atlanta Hawk fans do exist
7. The Wizards' fans are just as stupid as the Wizards' players
6. Detroit is so good, they can only beat themselves (just ask them)
5. There are week-old kittens that are less soft than Andrea Bargnani
4. When Josh Howard talks about smoking marijuana, it keeps Mark Cuban off the TV
3. Tracy McGrady will never, ever win a playoff series, because unlike (alleged) rapist Kobe Bryant, he is morally deficient
2. TBS Comedy Series are, despite all evidence to the contrary, Very Funny
1. Every team is now required to have a Designated Flopper
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